Oolon Coluphid

Trump: “All your base are belong to us!”
Spain: <drives golf cart onto runway>
Trump: “Somebody set up us the bomb!”

I always thought that almost-deserted small radio stations at night make a perfect backdrop for classical ghost stories. The Fog is the proof.

Laura Loomer and Tucker Carlson. Handbags, at noon. Bring your seconds.

I’ve got to give her my respect. Being questioned by this clownshow Boebert and not jumping over the table trying to strangle her must take a great deal of self control.

It’s really sad for me what a weird conspiracy nutcase Nena has become. Her music was such a defining factor in my life back then. She had to live through hardships, too. But it’s hard to bear what has become of her.

Drug abuse is rife in the US military. That’s why they made the heaviest drinker they could find their head honcho.

God Angrily Clarifies 'Don't Kill' Rule NEW YORK—Responding to recent events on Earth, God, the omniscient creator-deity worshipped by billions of followers of various faiths for more than 6,000 years, angrily clarified His longtime stance ...

… and also:

theonion.com/god-angrily-...

Maybe he is, after all, allergic to orange face paint.

You couldn’t make this up.
And if you did, everyone would say it’s too much.

The Ministry of Truth is working overtime.

As I scroll through triumphal pro-war tweets, thinking about this image a lot today:

I want the Buffalo Police to arrest the lying, negligent, cruel, incompetent CBP thugs who killed this man, even if they have to raid their offices to do so.

There must be accountability.

This aged well. Note the author.

Oh yes, and also if, maybe, let’s see… about 25 school children are killed when their school was obliterated by a US cruise missile? In a normal world this would count as murder. But that was pre-Epstein.

How can *anybody* walk by a man who shouts “Money for nothing”, without responding with “… and chicks for free!” 😂

But this isn’t just a regular account. Johnny MAGA appears to actually be a White House staffer named Garrett Wade who works for the Trump administration as a rapid response manager, helping to run the very same White House account his anonymous MAGA account amplifies. A phone number associated with Wade is linked to Johnny MAGA, according to a WIRED review of publicly available records, and the connection was confirmed by a source close to the White House. Wade and the White House did not respond to requests for comment.

The Johnny MAGA account was created in September 2021, according to its X profile. (It originally used a different handle, which referenced Wade’s birth year, according to records reviewed by WIRED.) While the account’s earliest available posts focused on NFTs, it has been a consistent pro-Trump presence since at least 2022. The operator of the Johnny MAGA account has not disclosed an official relationship with the White House while operating the Johnny MAGA X account. Multiple media outlets, including Mother Jones, TownHall, and the New York Post, have all linked out to posts on the Johnny MAGA account seemingly as organic reflections of public sentiment on political issues.

This is very good reporting that sheds light on just how small the extremely pro-Trump online right really is. The online right is totally astroturfed. The White House's own staffers are running meme accounts to make them look more popular than they are. www.wired.com/story/a-whit...

A sitting president taking revenge on his own citizens. Totally normal, nothing to see there folks.

Why hasn't Disney used the Muppets to duplicate what Warner Bros. did with Lego movies? We could be 10 episodes deep into Muppet Star Wars, Muppet Marvel, Muppet Indiana Jones. Hell, Muppet Avatar would make more sense than the actual series.

4-panel comic. (1) [Person with white hat talking to another person.] PERSON 1 with white hat: As Sherlock Holmes said, When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth. (2) PERSON 2: What about the possibility that you forgot to eliminate a possibility? Or that you eliminated one incorrectly? Both of those remain, too. (3) PERSON 1: You’re being pedantic. It’s just a general rule for deduction. PERSON 2: But it’s a *bad rule*. (4) PERSON 2: How often have you thought, “I can’t find this thing, and I’ve searched the whole house. The only place I haven’t looked is the car, so it *must* be there.” PERSON 2: ...And then it’s never in the car. PERSON 1: *It’s never in the car!*

Eliminating the Impossible

xkcd.com/3210/

They found him. He died.

Another murder by our immigration goon squads

A split-image portrait of Katherine Johnson, the pioneering Black NASA mathematician: On the left, a black-and-white historical photo from her NASA career in the 1960s shows a smiling middle-aged woman wearing cat-eye glasses and a light-colored dress with white collar and trim, seated at her desk with a globe and papers in the background. On the right, a color photo from 2015 depicts an elderly Katherine Johnson (in her late 90s) seated in a wheelchair during the Presidential Medal of Freedom ceremony, wearing glasses, a dark suit jacket, an orange top, a blue ribbon with the medal, and holding a green item in her lap, as she looks directly at the viewer with a gentle expression. The side-by-side images contrast her youthful professional life with her honored later years.

Mathematician & NASA 𝘩𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘳 Katherine Johnson died #OTD in 2020.

She was instrumental in the success of the first US manned spaceflights, calculating complex trajectories enabling humans to reach orbit & land on the moon. Her story was told in 𝘏𝘪𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘍𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘴 (book/movie). #WomenInSTEM #BHM

Thanks, I needed that.

‘Don’t go to the US – not with Trump in charge’: the UK tourist with a valid visa detained by ICE for six weeks Karen Newton was in America on the trip of a lifetime when she was shackled, transported and held for weeks on end. With tourism to the US under increasing strain, she says, ‘If it can happen to me, i...

'She has a message for other tourists considering a trip to America: “Don’t go – not with Trump in charge. It’s totally out of control over there. There’s no accountability. They don’t seem to need a reason for detaining you.”'
#ICE
www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

Aide Wearily Begins 5th Explanation Of Why Trump Can’t Pardon Prince Andrew

Aide Wearily Begins 5th Explanation Of Why Trump Can’t Pardon Prince Andrew https://theonion.com/aide-wearily-begins-5th-explanation-of-why-trump-cant-pardon-prince-andrew/

Judge scolds Mark Zuckerberg's team for wearing Meta glasses to social media trial A Los Angeles judge ordered Meta officials to remove their AI glasses at a trial over the impact of social media on users.

"The judge upbraided the Meta team and said if you guys have recorded anything, you have to dispose of it or I will hold you in contempt," Jacob Ward, a technology journalist and the host of the Rip Current Podcast, told CBS News, calling the incident "an extraordinary misstep" by Meta.

That sounds… not right.
I want to try it.

And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to other people for a change, a girl sitting on her own in a café in Rickmansworth suddenly realized what had gone wrong all the time…