Julie Andrews is addicted to massive spoons.
A 'ladle vice' if you will.
Julie Andrews is addicted to massive spoons.
A 'ladle vice' if you will.
The first lure of anagram club is...
27.02.2026 11:38 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
My mate has fusilli woven into his dreadlocks.
He's a pastafarian.
It's compulsory (phased out in 2000 I believe). Used to use the 73 route a lot back in the day.
27.02.2026 10:46 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0I can make clothes out of crepe paper, but it's not my strong suit.
27.02.2026 10:44 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Bus stop it!
26.02.2026 21:42 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0He probably had completely inaccurate careers advice.
25.02.2026 21:30 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Fact: The Wheels on the Bus was written in 1937, but motorised buses date back to the 1890s. So there was a forty-year period where people were just getting on buses with no idea of what was going to happen.
25.02.2026 17:29 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 4 📌 0
A flasher was thinking about retiring.
In the end he decided to stick it out for another year.
I used to be an underwear model, but one day I forgot my pants, so I had to do it in my PE kit.
24.02.2026 11:31 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Now that does look tasty.
24.02.2026 10:24 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
“What have you come as?”
“A werewolf.”
“But… they're your normal clothes”.
“It's not a full moon”.
Lick who?
24.02.2026 10:17 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Cheesey peas I think.
23.02.2026 11:57 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Thanks Limahl
21.02.2026 16:28 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Popeye did.
21.02.2026 16:27 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Saucy!
19.02.2026 21:23 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0They are sprinkled far and wide.
19.02.2026 19:25 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
I’ve just been banned from my support group for people sexually attracted to buildings.
To be honest, I’m feeling a little flat now.
Tip: Convince people you’re good at throwing balls by walking around a fairground holding a coconut.
19.02.2026 10:22 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0
Cat: “Give it to me straight Doc”.
Doctor: “I’m sorry, there’s no good way to say it.....you’ve got curiosity....”.
Le Oral.
Because you’re worth it.
If someone asks you if you’re in the queue, what they actually mean is:
“You’re really shit at queuing, aren’t you?”
Just been chewing on some monkey nuts.
I’ve also been banned from the zoo.
A girl just asked me to have sex, but I had to disappoint her.
We had sex.
My mate rang me and said: “Meet me at the Vinyl Shop in 45”.
I made it there in 33, which was Record Time.
Any pigeon is a homing pigeon if you tie a boomerang to it.
16.02.2026 16:46 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0If you Picture This, you're Dreaming.
16.02.2026 13:24 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
In school we were taught about pessimism.
The class was half empty.
If you think about it, we’re all obsessed with Blondie lyrics in one way or another.
16.02.2026 11:05 — 👍 6 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 1