J

I present my wrists to you

Text message: Just pint? Meet [brown square emoji]

To use [brown square] to mean “After Eight” is a very bad joke, but my friend hates it so I’m obliged to use it every time

Sin é go díreach

I knew I had seen a similar thing somewhere before

Labour is a far right party

It’s usually me doing things like that to them so I can’t say a word

I read all my posts out loud before posting them. That's why they're so good

Spent an hour forensically rooting through the bins in work yesterday for an expensive item that had vanished. Spilled bin juice into my shoe. Co-worker just phoned to say they accidentally brought said item home.

It’s hard to avoid that realisation alright

Get less mad at Goodreads/Storygraph reviews by choosing to see them as outlets for people who like to write little essays recording their failings in reading comprehension

Breaking: Anthropic CEO says Claude may or may not have gained consciousness, as the model has begun showing symptoms of IBS

There's an e-mail virus doing the rounds, if you get an e-mail with an attachment titled 'Anna Kournikova', DO NOT CLICK ON IT and delete immediately. It is a worm. #NetNews

It was me. I said it.

Heard someone saying “I’m cognizant of that” irl. Yes, you know it. Just say you know it. Dickhead.

Ear doctor: Don’t use Q-Tips
Me already imagining putting a screw driver I found in the driveway in my ear when I get home: I womt

Two starlings, both alike in dignity. One is dive-bombing the other one.

This remains the best picture of some birds I have ever taken.

Dying of skin suffocation like that woman in Goldfinger but instead of gold paint it’s Voltarol

🎶

The cover of Have I Got Your Attention, a book about adult ADHD in Ireland by Ailín Kennedy and Mike McGrath-Bryan.

BIG NEWS: my pal Ails and I co-wrote a book about ADHD in Ireland!

Have I Got Your Attention? has loads of info, big chats, tips 'n' tricks - plus real-life experience, through nine incredible interviewees!

#adhd #ireland #spéirghorm #booksky

Preorders: www.irishacademicpress.ie/product/have...

Tenants of 36 households in Co #Wexford were told their landlord was delivering eviction notices because of the Govt’s new rental rules, according to a leaked video.

Residents heard the landlord would follow “radio shows and political debate” before making a “final decision” on their housing.

Where does Israeli impunity end? Fuck this

This is actual, literal terrorism perpetrated by Israel against the Lebanese

When neighbours act standoffish around me I wonder if it’s my general offputting demeanour or is it specifically that they’ve heard me loudly shouting Bleh! Bleh! in Dracula voice to scare the pigeons off the bird table

The subscribers get the really good propaganda

This reminds me of my former boss’s constant refrain of “you can’t say anything these days” and then when I said someone leaving money to the Catholic Church in their will was like rubbing fat into the sows arse he became indignant to the point of tears

(Níl mé ar Insta)

Cinnte, ar aghaidh leat!

Ní raibh sé ar intinn agam, ach tá an chuma sin air gan dabht!

Seanchartún le haghaidh Seachtain na Gaeilge

Fianna Fáil insiders have bemoaned the loss in recent years of the Total Cunt vote, and the feeling within the Parliamentary Party is that Jim O’Callaghan is the man to win those Total Cunts back. Micheál Lehane, RTÉ News