Dan

The attorney general and the FBI director, a manosphere podcaster bro, pulled into the situation room a member of Congress best known for getting kicked out of a Beetlejuice musical for drunkenly giving her date a handy, in order to pressure her about the president's child sex trafficking scandal.

I like to think that his Christian name is “Jumbus”

Love to see one or several Jumbos Díaz

Fuck you.

Our corporate culture embraces smoking wherever, no big whoop

It was a classier time, when you could be both a Dapper Don and a Teflon Don.

Former Soviet Republic drunk, no question

Man looks like the giant booger from the Mucinex ads.

It’ll be fine

Looking forward to the "Why I Left New York" essay by Gozer the Gozerian

Good

They are formating and they are formating very powerfully, some say more than ever before

SIR! What about your gaffes?

60-Across in the Defector.com crossword appears to be a very mean and nasty insult at @davidjroth.bsky.social and his avant-garde pronunciations of fast-casual bakery chains.

Ryan, I may have done this

Zac Taylor is just a complete loser.

@treblaw.bsky.social Gus seems to be pimping Brian Kelly to Penn State. That would make everyone happy right?

I was giving out small beers to thirsty passers by.

Which of his mistresses contacted the authorities?

Multiple accounts on ICE Watch Facebook pages are reporting that agents pulled a couple out of their vehicle in Aurora, Illinois, arrested them, and then abandoned the couple’s toddler in the backseat.

Even Cortes didn't torch his boats as badly.

One of us! One of us!

I opened up an old hard drive to find something and I stumbled across this:
apparently, at some point, I made @edsbs.bsky.social into the Bengals logo for some reason long lost to time

Could I … uh . Get one under the table here?

I regret to inform you that Babu Frik is in the Epstein Files.

I'm sorry, are you referring to "Gridiron Genius: A Masterclass in Building Teams and Winning at the Highest Level"?

Holly, here's the real question. Where can that Modelo hoodie hypothetically be purchased?

"Welcome to the Distraction, I'm Roth and that's Dan Dakich"

I mean you could do that, but have you considered spending two days in an absolute frothing rage reading the opinions of the worst and dumbest people in the world?

Reading @ramzy.bsky.social's essay on the Strauss scandal outside the immediate effects on Ohio State and @therooster.bsky.social on the latest GOP property tax heist is really bringing home the fact that this state is utterly at the mercy of its worst people and interests. Still a bellweather!