Jason Wallace

Gawain the green knight opening a letter sealed with wax

Little Alex Horne in his studio chair with the caption "so a simple task: land a fair blow anywhere on the green knight. One year later meet him at the green chapel, receive the same blow yourself."

A cut to a wider shot showing Greg Davies in his throne turning to Little Alex Horne subtitled "Well surely no one just ran up and whanged his head clean off."

Cut back to Little Alex Horne subtitled "Let's see Gawain first."

Looks like the original has been swept away by the sands of time.

some of you are looksmaxxing when you need to be booksmaxxing

There’s no point during the detention of a five-year-old that any person with a functioning moral center would not step back to reassess the situation and their place in it. That nobody involved did proves they lack the common interiority required to successfully coexist in ordered society.

Men who look upon themselves born to reign, and others to obey, soon grow insolent; selected from the rest of mankind their minds are early poisoned by importance; and the world they act in differs so materially from the world at large, that they have but little opportunity of knowing its true interests, and when they succeed to the government are frequently the most ignorant and unfit of any throughout the dominions.

Common Sense, published 250 years ago today.

Okay bear with me. My amazing friend Robyn (@haykebyr.bsky.social) did this amazing image based on my stupid ass joke. It's Miss Piggy photoshopped into some Sister of Battle armour, with the white bob haircut and a fleur de lys tattoo on her cheek and everything. Except she's got pink satin gloves on. The caption is "In the Grim Darkness of the Far Future there is Only Moi" because that's the whole joke. Thank you.

ℑ𝔫 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔊𝔯𝔦𝔪 𝔇𝔞𝔯𝔨𝔫𝔢𝔰𝔰 𝔬𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔉𝔞𝔯 𝔉𝔲𝔱𝔲𝔯𝔢, 𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯𝔢 𝔦𝔰 𝔒𝔫𝔩𝔶 𝔐𝔬𝔦

“We shed as we pick up, like travelers who must carry everything in their arms, and what we let fall will be picked up by those left behind. The procession is very long and life is very short. We die on the march. But there is nothing outside the march so nothing can be lost to it.”

— Tom Stoppard.

Cover art for Contentment corner S04E07, made to resemble the cover of a Soap Opera Digest magazine. The main image is two older ladies, one in a sheriff's uniform. The text reads "EDNA and EBBY both have mysteries to solve, so it's time to put on some... INVESTIGATIVE JAZZ." Above, in a box, is a young shirtless man gagged and tied to a chair. The text reads "GEODE kidnapped - but does he even mind??" And at the bottom, a picture of a beautiful young woman with the caption "Can GORNADETTO keep her plan together?"

S04E07 of our ongoing comedic soap opera, Contentment Corner, entitled “Investigative Jazz,” is available now!

www.contentmentcorner.com

Stoning Our Neighbors to Death Makes the Corn Grow High, and Elitist Liberals Should Stop Attacking This Traditional Value Since Biblical times, stoning people to death has been a horrible punishment reserved for the worst criminals. But now, in PC liberal America, the ...

"Lotteries and ritual stoning are integral parts of American life. Whether or not the lottery actually increases the yearly harvest, rural working-class Americans think it does. Let me be blunt: liberals who want to abolish ritual murder are the reason that Donald Trump won."

EMILY DICKINSON, JEDI KNIGHT

Not so clumsy, nor so random -
As a blaster - in its rage

More elegant - the weapon
More civilized - the age

the symbolism of “Trump destroying the White House for a overpriced luxury vanity project, during a government shut down, days after a historically-large mass demonstration against his regime called “No Kings”’ would be rightly viewed as laying it on a little thick if it was in a work of fiction

the Command & Conquer series is 30 years old today we so have an excuse to share this iconic moment with Tim Curry

a boxcar with graffiti parody of the nine inch nails album cover art for "pretty hate machine" but it says "nine inch rails pretty freight machine"

what if we kissed on the pretty freight machine

Cover art for the latest episode of Contentment Corner, styled after the magazine Soap Opera Digest. The main image is an angry woman and a shady-looking guy with an eyepatch standing together. The text beneath them reads "She's free! He's helping! Is ANYONE safe?" and then the episode title, "Case and the Basket Case." An insert picture of a nosy old lady and a flustered young man is captioned "PLUS Edna grills the new guys!" Additional text at the top reads "FUNCH: DAY ONE AT ST. CORBY SOAP ...but does he even care about soap? Like... at all?" Additional text at the bottom reads "Quandary knows the truth! What now?"

A new episode of our comedic soap opera, Contentment Corner — S04E06, "Case and the Basket Case" — is available now! www.contentmentcorner.com

4 strip comic. first frame, we see Horst Wessel and two other storm troopers carrying a large nazi flag. text reads : Horst Wessel was a young storm trooper recognized as a skilled public speaker by the nazi party. he also wrote the song that became the partys anthem and german co-national anthem until 1945. second frame, we see a portrait of Horst. text reads : in 1930, his landlady hired two men who happened to be communists to evict him over unpaid rent and alleged proxenetism. He died in the fight. thrid frame, we see Goebbels speaking in front of a large crowd. text reads : Goebbels, the nazi chief propagandist, had been looking for someone to turn into a christian martyr for the party and drum up enrollment. he turned wessel's funeral into a major propaganda event full of speeches antagonizing leftists. fourth frame, we see the State Farm Stadium with a large banner advertizing Charlie Kirk's funeral. text reads : thinking about him today for no particular reason.

No particular reason

Charlie Kirk’s Legacy Deserves No Mourning The white Christian nationalist provocateur wasn’t a promoter of civil discourse. He preached hate, bigotry, and division

The Nation pulls NO punches, from @espiers.bsky.social

"There's no requirement to take part in this whitewashing campaign. Refusing to join in doesn’t make anyone a bad person. It’s a choice to write an obituary that begins “Joseph Goebbels was a gifted marketer and loving father to six children.”

Cover image for Contentment Corner S04E05. The image is a parody/homage to Soap Opera Digest, featuring characters and storyline teases from the episode.

S04E05 of our long-running comedic soap opera, Contentment Corner, entitled “My Baby!,” is available now!

www.contentmentcorner.com

The absence of mourning is not equal to the presence of celebration, and it’s strange how many people have conflated the two over the last day.

She didn't even mean to tell the future ... she was just calculating the most plausible outcomes of racism in America

Wordsworth called Byron ‘coarse’ and ‘epigrammatic’, ‘a panderer to the basest artistic urges’ and secretly insane. Byron referred to Wordsworth simply as ‘Turdsworth’.

Why should I write better when a machine can do it for me? Because actually no one can do it for you, because your voice is unique among all the people on earth. Siri never petted a horse's neck. Alexa has never been ghosted by the captain of the football team. But you have lived, your heart is beating, you have suffered, and you have something important to say. It's a human's job, to use words, and whatever job you give to a machine, that part of your brain goes dark. Maybe it's worth it when it comes to remembering phone numbers and directions, but when that part of your brain that uses words goes dark, that's a vast area that's very close to your soul. Don't let some internet platform convince you that what you have to say and create isn't worthwhile. Words are the echo of your soul. Honing that echo matters.

this iconic advertising copywriter named Kathy Hepinstall Parks died over the weekend and I wanted to share something from her website I thought Bluesky would like

i am so sick of the dumbest people alive being in charge of everything and the second dumbest people alive writing opinion columns about how it's good

Timeless: A History of Chrono Trigger How a Super Nintendo JRPG developed by a Dream Team of creators is still finding new fans 25 years later

Chrono Trigger's 30 years old you say? Time flies.

It’s nine o’clock on a Saturday
The unholy thing shambles in
He’s too big for the chair sitting next to me
And he makes an unbearable din

Sing us a song, you’re the piano man
Your skin is a wooden facade
You’ve brass pedals for hands
And your hair’s copper strands
Give unbearable insult to god

the thing that trans people ask of the world is so tiny, really. just to be able to exist as the person they are, without the rest of us being weird or cruel about it. it's a deep shame on our society that we are unable to deliver on so small a thing.

Writers should internalize Lao Tzu's lesson about how the emptiness at the center of a wheel is what makes it useful, and how a pot is valuable because of where the clay *isn't*. Corporate geek culture has warped us into thinking that negative spaces are flaws that need to be fixed.

You can have story. Or you can have data.

Story is choices. Data is no choices, just more stuff, but presented with no weight, value or sense. Just more.

We are watching the tyranny of the takeover of story - of choice, of taste, of craft, of meaning - by the data people.

Horrible.

I realize broad science-literacy problems cannot generally be solved just by shoving more facts at people but I really wish more people understood that the entire purpose and mechanism of a vaccine is to educate your OWN immune system, making it about the most "natural" medical intervention possible

Every rich person is going to tell *you* how great AI teaching is while sending *their* kids to the kind of schooling the Ancient Greeks would recognize. I just wish everyone would think about why that is.