Dr. Scuttles

He offered it to Wicket, who was thoroughly miserable about his feathers getting wet. But did not leave or refuse additional spritzes, I noticed.

Victoria enjoys being misted by a water bottle in the summer heat. That Man spritzed me a few times too. That’s what he called it, “would you like a spritz too, Dr. Scuttles?” Would I. “Spritz.” An onomatopoeia coined from the sound the water bottle makes.

Anyway, it’s wonderful. What a treat.

Victoria thinks something is going on between Moulder and Scully. I’m undecided. They’re colleagues!

I had no luck motivating That Man to put Star Trek on. However, sure enough he settled in with X-Files, and he let me stay in the room (and gave me a small bowl of my beloved potato chips). A cozy evening was had!

That Man has set himself up in the guest room for the moment to help Victoria acclimate. He is good like that. An exceptional kind of human. There is a tv in there. I have been shuffling in and out. No idea how to encourage him to put on Star Trek, but I shall try. Ideas?

He made polite conversation though. The usual. “How old are you?” “Where are you from?” “Do you enjoy eating raw hamburger?” (Who doesn’t)

Wicket had a chance to meet Victoria this afternoon. That Man brought him into the guest room on the falconer’s glove. He seemed ALARMED at her size, in a way that guarantees her safety. Good. He is my only friend—other than That Man—but he can be such a pest when he feels superior to anyone.

She did not, alas. But not for lack of trying.

Anyway, Victoria seems kind and well mannered. I told her sometimes That Man watches Star Trek. Lately it’s been more X-Files than anything else, but maybe I can step on the remote.

She said Next Generation is her favorite. I let her know I’m more of a Deep Space Nine kind of fellow. She said she likes that one too. She adores Odo and Quark (truly, who doesn’t?) Wicket called into the room that he likes Darth Vader. Wicket. Really?

I didn’t know snakes could be so fond of television, but she told me her former owner enjoyed quiet nights sitting on a couch beside her tank, watching Star Trek and MST3K, before he passed away a couple of years ago.

She said those two shows feel like home.

That Man allowed me to shuffle down the hallway and into the guest room with him. I took the chance to introduce myself to our gigantic snake guest. She is a ball python. She is about four and a half feet long and twenty years old. She really enjoys Star Trek and MST3k. Her name is Victoria.

We all have—and enjoy—our own spaces. I go in the catio-thing as well, but not as often as Wicket. Partly because Wicket has an infuriating habit of standing on my shell when I am in there. That owl has zero boundaries. 😑

Wicket has a large Critter Nation cage in That Man’s home office, along with a perch he enjoys grumbling on. He gets a lot of outdoors time too, in the big “catio-style” enclosure That Man build in the backyard last summer. Not a true catio though, as none of us our cats obviously. Still, you know.

For those of you wondering, I tend to stick to my kiddie pool and pen in the kitchen. I’m happiest there. The clicking of my claws on the linoleum is a very satisfying sound.

That Man is setting her tank up in the guest bedroom. This tank is massive. That Man could live in it. I predict no guests this summer. Well, aside from the huge snake.

To the annoyance of Wicket and my relief. I’d love a low key summer.

At least Wicket, myself, and this snake will all be evenly matched.

She’s wrangling a HUGE cage. Wow. This snake is gigantic.

Well, the Woman from Quinn Animal Shelter has just pulled into the driveway…

…This should be interesting.

That Man has gotten peanut butter on his cellphone, which, while not a crisis, seems to be a very People-kind of problem to have.

Wicket has his feathers in a fluff over the new guest—who hasn’t even arrived yet. I’m sticking to my kiddie pool in the kitchen until he’s in a better mood and can hold conversation. 🙄 He needs a favorite snack. Life is easier with a favorite snack.

That Man let the Woman at Quinn shelter know that, in defense of me. He’s quite good to me. I shall reward him by continuing to give no trouble. And allowing him to keep his fingers.

From what I could hear of That Man’s side of the conversation, it sounds like this creature will be formidable enough that Wicket can give her no trouble. There was concern I could give trouble, but I’m past troublemaking days. Give me a bowl of potato chips and I’m quite content.

Seems they had a tree fall and damage their roof. Terrible thing. Of course we’re all too happy to help if we can. Well, I am. Wicket doesn’t like to help anyone under any circumstances. But that’s his journey.

Hmmm… That Man just received a phone call from the Woman at Quinn Animal Shelter. Seems Wicket and I may have a guest soon…

This is superb. Artist credit El Gato Gomez, you can find them on Instagram under @elgatogomez_art www.instagram.com/elgatogomez_... Happy holidays, whatever your shape or form.

So, I’m a snapping turtle and also—humbly—a cryptids expert. If you have any cryptids to share with me, feel free at any time. Also, I love potato chips.

Well, that’s me in a half-shell.

Did the “bird-site-turned-weird-links-we-shouldn’t-click-on” app finally fall? Delightful. They should have changed the bird logo directly into a catfish symbol. Anyway, welcome.

Who are all these people? What’s going on?