🫧(crysta’s for closers)🫧

watched this once in 2010 with my friend and we still to this day say “apple juice. apple juice flood.” to each other regularly 😂

I’m sure I’ve said this before, but I’m actually so fucking done with trying to get people to like me. I’m a fucking good person and a great friend and fun to be around and if you don’t like me, it’s truly your loss. 😘

I FEEL FUCKING CRAZY ALL THE TIME WHY DO I HAVE TO CARE SO FUCKING MUCH ABOUT EVERYTHING

it’s a concept I’ve been struggling with all year. it’s not even about being thin for me, I’m very pro fat.
But yeah, a lot of things would be a lot easier for me if I could affordably access it. I mostly worry how I would be perceived by other fat people for l*sing we*ght, ya kno?

sorry! 😬

I fear the rise of oz*mpic and regression of “body positivity” has done irreparable damage to my self worth. And the kicker is that having access to that same drug would radically improve my quality of life. I hate even acknowledging it, but it consumes my brain every day.

pcos is crazy because sometimes you get a period and sometimes you’re just a raging bitch for three days

I’d love it if we made it.

holy shit jen this is incredible

All 👏🏻 birth 👏🏻 control 👏🏻 should 👏🏻 be 👏🏻 FREE!!! 👏🏻

AS YOU SHOULD lmao
There are free condoms in nearly every bar/restaurant/small business in my neighborhood, but I have a latex allergy so I have to use non-latex which are rarely available in the free bins 😭

when the fuck did condoms get so expensive????? is this why all my friends started having kids at an alarming rate?

arizona is fully booked babyyyyy can’t wait for fob baseball fest

who’s going to innings I wanna do fob and fob adjacent karaoke

thinkin about her

🗣️HOT🗣️
(respectfully)

just so tired of twisting and molding myself for people who barely bend for me

it’s INSANE 😂😂😂

it’s ~fall family photo~ season in Nebrask which means every time I open fb, I see a new group of white people standing in a field, posed the exact same way as the last group of white people I saw the last time I opened fb 😂

Been thinking a lot lately about that episode of Parks and Rec where Leslie and Tom have to rebrand fluoride in the water as TDazzle in order to get the public to support it.

like why the fuck at 32 do I still feel like I don’t belong

I just saw Wicked and I fear I’m going to become ✨insufferable✨

Omg 😭😭😭 ty ty 🙏

Omg please I need the link so badly

is that a little clandestine flip phone pin?!

pete wentz lookalike competition in my bedroom right now

oh I LOVE a surprise variant!!!!

these variants fuuuuuuck

BOB ODENKIRK IS SO HOT

fake ass emo i saw you experience joy