Elisabeth Donaldson

I will be calling it the Gulf of Mexico and I will celebrating Black History month until the day I fugging die bro

This will go down in history as one of the most iconic moments of my life 💅🏼

I noticed his window was open, looked down at the steaming bag of dog sh*t in my hand and swiftly launched it at his face. It hit him between the eyes and fell into his car….

As I waited at an intersection to cross the street a man in his car started to cat call me making aggressive animalistic sounds….

About 20 years ago in Los Angeles, I was taking my dog for a morning walk wearing some some ratty pajamas, no makeup and glasses. In my hand was a plastic bag full of literal steaming dog sh*t…

This has been the longest year… uh month… uh week of my life 🫠

The amount of prepper gear in my TikTok shop cart right now… 🤪😝😳

I never hear about Luigi anymore 😢

Has anyone been to the grocery store? How are eggs lookin?

What is a “blue” joke 🤣?

There is so much noise about “what women want” but the simplicity is that good communication skills, kindness, transparency, enthusiastic support, the action of improving yourself, passion towards life & interests, empathy and making healthy, empowered choices is all we are really looking for

So what makes Bluesky different? Can I swear here???

How do I get the Bluesky algorithm to show me something other than bad memes and cat pics (I don’t even own a cat)

This is just me- but when every single piece of content someone posts is about their “brand” I’m just like 🙄🥱 entertain us a lil bit!

The American Government is basically just the cast for an all Star Reality Show at this point

Okay- so how do I get some action here in this big blue sky? I’m a fun lady!

*liking a story once every three months: your ex situationship
*liking a story once a week: fk boi
*liking a story once a day: has a crush on you
*liking a few stories a day: your buddy
*liking every story, every day: stalker

I’m just going to keep sharing this song until it’s playing on a loop in your head every day and you’re singing it with glee while you put up your Christmas decorations 💋

I asked chatGBT to make a picture of my dream man (with very few visual descriptors- just personality traits) and WHY did this photo look like my damn crush?!?! 😭😆

Selfies in Chicago 🩶

I’m so tired that I just drank a Celsius and then took a nap

Elisabeth has been an Actress for “so f*cking long” that you can see her dancing with Beyonce in a Destiny’s Child music video. Blessed with a great jawline, she hopes to resist aging long enough "for Hollywood to recognize what a talented actress I am & cast me as an unhinged Trad Wife"