Art Teacher Fails

During a testing break it was funny to watch 3 kids break out monopoly, tell me they had never played, read the directions, and then within half hour they were yelling at each other about money, LoL. Ohhhh monopoly

I was really enjoying you on here, RIP.

#4: the kids playing with the magnetic blocks loved them and were super happy, but then also liked to make towers and then smash them on the floor.(why?)
Then, they made the twin towers and a plane crashing into them.
(Why does gen z joke this way?)
This is why we never have free time lord

#3: another student who.was also trying to cheat got angry at me and ran to the office complaining that I was using official Uno rules and not "street uno rules ms." (He was blatantly trying to get a second turn by using the reverse card incorrectly, then gaslit me about it and ran out the room)

#2: The ENL students all played UNO and got into very intense arguments. In one class I had to ban them all from uno because one student got angry and took all the cards away. Later,

#1: Sooo I tried to give some constructive free art time before a 4 day weekend with uno, magnetic blocks and art games and this is what happened:

Is that an eraser in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

I just saw a Tesla drive onto a park pedestrian path, then drive over the grass, onto the highway. What the hey Tesla?

I never realized that a large part of my job as an art teacher consists of being the CDC and figuring out kid zero who got all the staff sick, and, crime handwriting analysis. Disguise your handwriting all you want, I know who you are, wall writer!

The kid who draws the most P Dogs in art, has now crossed over into science class, with this unfortunate dog. Or fortunate? You decide....

Somewhere on TT, someone has said "get off my dick" because now I've heard this, at least 500 times this week in middle school already, and it's not even Friday.

A very strange and sad attempt at bullying? lol

It's a P Dog week in art!

We can do cocaine, or, cocaine?

I have a class obsessed with penii. We have since dubbed them "P Dogs". Collage Pdogs. A double P dog.

I had to teach scissor safety and how to use scissors for middle school, and it's one of my fave things to teach because I have to talk about holes, and how you put fingers in the holes, and how you should not shove too many fingers into the holes. With a straight face.

Spies this word from across the room.

Oh wait, it says Rocks. #NotCocks

It's not everyday that you find a piece of someone's bra tangled in with the coloring supplies...why

That's one not very round, emoji looking, bubblegum "ball".

Still applies, still applies...

This week during covering the student MS cafeteria, the hot lunch was very popular, chicken and waffles.
Kid to me in line: this is an exciting day teacher! It's not often anymore that chicken tenders come around.

Ahhh the old people wisdom of middle school. Hot chicken tenders.

The Grade 6 kids are a bit weird this year. A bit weird.
https://i.gifer.com/MdY4.gif

Yep, miss that Booty call game.
#CallOfBooty2ElectricBoogaloo

Does not subscribe

Kid to me: I don't know what was good or bad about my summer.

Me: what did you like the best?

Outcome:

(I'm not sure what the heck is happening here, I'm assuming he jumped into a big dick shaped swimming pool?)

Welp, that's a wrap for day 1 of the school year!
#90DegreesDay #TheKidsHateSchoolAlready
#Smells

I may own something, but I've been burned by: cool chairs with cat pee, a BB gun filled with monster sized cockroaches that spilled out suddenly like a horror movie when home by myself and I had to go into a stealth mode trying to kill them all before they invaded my apartment. That was awful.

I like this quiet vibe better here anyway, I started ATF for shits and giggles and then tOG happened and derailed my entire vibe. Like for this weird art piece. #ArtTeacherFails

I'm all ok for sex positivity on here, but ye old Twitter somehow is officially the run down strip club off the internet now. #RomanHouseVibes

Top o the morning to ya!