Nejiro Obake

//you think that's gonna stop us?

"...Oh no, he's gonna learn to dance and use bad words. Someone quick! Stop him!"

"Nejiro Obake. One of the most veteran SOLDIERs we have left... and yet not promoted to First for some reason."

"Good. I'm glad I was able to help."

He pauses as he considers saying more but seems to decide against it and has another long sip.

Pat pat pat.

"Insistent aren't you?"

He sighs, a small huff of defeat.

"Anyway, feeling a bit better then? The tea must be helping."

"It does. Might take a couple of exchanges before you can get the punchline out but causing that moment of hesitation when they cringe is generally worthwhile in how exploitable it is. But as a SOLDIER, I can take a hit or several."

He nods at that. "Yeah, fair fair. Definitely good stuff to be made from Eikon Hunting. Although my last hunts like that I got a baby Behemoth... Who has grown... And a Rathalos...."

"Sir, you literally asked for it. Just enjoy how many enemies have to suffer it. Pretty sure any Genesis Copies utterly hate my guts for it."

"Okay, okay, you got me.... Happy?"

"No but the nicotine hit makes you tolerate it."

"Hey the heck you doin'?"

//Oh come on we all know you're poly.

"Well... yeah but you don't gotta put me on blast about it."

He winces at the full name. Ooooh she can burn with words.

He really has no response that would not get him scolded.

Head desk.

"O Bounteous Branch, your devoted sapling desires succor...."

"At least as well as I usually do, I imagine."

Pot meet kettle.

"Well now you put me on the spot, it's way more impactful having something to play off organically... I don't know how much attention we get. But typically I have been one to test the experimental weapons. Preferring lances. Providing feedback I usually make sure everyone... sees my point."

"For me 'other entities' usually means Gerolt. Otherwise I'm smithing with generally whatever new metal is fashionable at the time, Ruthenium seems the current favorite."

Anytime. You're welcome.

"Well Air Force is a ton of fun... Slice is Right is good practice and Leap of Faith as well.... Don't really remember any of the others? If there are any..."

"It is common to insult an enemy to goad them into dropping their guard. I find they have far less resistance to dad jokes and cringe-inducing puns. If one expects a blade they not prepared for a hammer."

There is a reason he is one of the most successful 2nd's.

He shrugs.

"Dunno, most of the weapons I get are already named."

"I named my sword Emotions, because when I hit you with it, you're gonna have feelings."

Yes he knows it's corny but it was too funny to not say.

"YYSAAAAYYYYYLLE!!!"

//I'm sorry there was a fucking WHAT?!

//And then "Sometimes man? I'm always man!"

But also magnet? Nah, Y'shtola's a black hole for attraction.

//The urge to have Nejiro respond to that with: "Did... Did you just call me a woman?"

Counterpoint. It is impossible not to be attracted to Y'shtola.

"Valentione's is coming up...

...OH FUCK! VALENTIONE'S IS COMING UP!"

Looks between Estinien and Aymeric.

"...I mean maybe if it were a lovers quarrel?"

Sometimes the best way to proxy through your trauma too though. I know it's helped me with putting it on Nejiro.

You always got my support.