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Dr. Twittenheimer

@drtwittenheimer.bsky.social

I'm not a comedic genius. I'm just a regular genius who writes brilliant jokes.

34 Followers  |  1 Following  |  6 Posts  |  Joined: 09.02.2026  |  1.3593

Latest posts by drtwittenheimer.bsky.social on Bluesky

"There's plenty of fish in the sea."

- Supportive friend / imprecise ichthyologist

10.02.2026 19:04 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Maybe the real zombie apocalypse is all the friends we turned into zombies along the way.

09.02.2026 19:09 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

🎢 "Ra-Ra-Rasputin, he always kept the ice so clean." 🎢

- Zamboni M.

09.02.2026 19:01 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

"Seven. Seven. Seven. Seven. Seven."

- Non-random number generator

09.02.2026 16:31 β€” πŸ‘ 4    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0

I hope my last words are something simple, like "That meal and the sex were both great, but I'd better get to bed since I'm 120 years old".

09.02.2026 16:29 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

I wonder if dung beetles refer to us as pizza mammals.

09.02.2026 16:03 β€” πŸ‘ 12    πŸ” 1    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 1

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