Very good impression, but not enough saliva. So close, tho.

Has the go fund me been set up for this hero yet?

20 bucks he says “Russia Russia Russia” before the speech is over.

That’s something I’d buy online.

Such a fine line between “curious” and “fueled by sociopathy and frontotemporal dementia”, isn’t it?

Reporter in my head: “Sir, the only thing grosser than your incompetence is your… well… whole body.”

Not even kidding when I ask this- is he pranking us and actually on his knees?

Wonder what Niki Minaj had to say to that.

I think what makes us so mad is the total lack of horrified reaction by everyone standing there.

When do we start calling them “ProFa”?

Some books are better as “listen-y” books (my Audible books): “A Gentleman in Moscow,”Thursday Murder Club,”. Some are better as “read-y” books (Kindle): “James,”Project Hail Mary.”

Yes. It’s called the US Presidency.

You don’t know her. She goes to a different school.

Homer trying to convince Marge to be a surrogate: “Come on, Marge! It’s ‘uterUS’, not ‘uterYOU’!”

I feel like he’s auditioning for the part of the obnoxious jock on “Glee.”

And that’s saying something.

I was listening and made a fist pump and said “YESSssss!” While driving my car.

Mine’s on the way!

I was listening live and I was so glad to hear someone speak the plain truth. I didn’t detect a lack of empathy- just factual commentary.What a disappointment.

God, everything he does is weird.

I don’t know this country anymore.

“Fluoride, Schmuoride!”

America. Where everybody gets to do boring shit in peace. ❤️❤️

My kid- to whom you dealt a raw f*cking deal (in terms of mental and physical health) but who keeps getting up, every day. (But he is one funny motherf*cker, so thanks for that❤️)

I am a late middle-aged divorced woman with an adult child living with me in an apartment . I have zero prospects. But know this- if I ever remarry, I WILL be walking down the aisle to this.

Can you get DTW to come over to Bluesky??

Sadly, he is unhumiliate-able.
Not because he’s “tough”, but because to him, 2 + 2 = yellow.

The fuck is with the “Thank you for your attention to this matter?” Did you just e-mail DoorDash customer service for delivering your Funyuns to the neighbors??!! The dementia is strong in this one.