Stonemanwitch

Instagram: “we’ve noticed you’re gay. Would you like perpetual streams of noxious “”ironic”” homophobic jokes?”
Me: “no thank you.”
Insta: …
Me: …
Insta: “how about muscle men asmr?”
Me: “… Okay.”

@althaeasebastiani.bsky.social thank you, friend. 🙏

Thank you though. I appreciate your kindness.

This whole experience has broken me. I hate the feeling of struggling like this.

I wish I could get a loan out for a couple grand or something, just to ease my stress.

Mom hasn’t heard back from the judge about her unemployment yet. Storage is due soon and I have only enough for three more days here. Trying not to freak out.

Sharing this yet again. I appreciate the kindness and support. Mom is still dealing with her post surgery issues. I’m trying to keep us both afloat and hard when I’m disabled.

Morbid teenage me who read academic books on Salem and the European witch hunts (Normandy being a personal interest) would be floored right now by the tangential connection.

On that side, I’m related to some women named Mindwell, Experience, and Thankful.

Not feeling good today so I’ve been playing around some more on that ancestry site. On mom’s side I have a multi great grandma who was born in Hartford, Connecticut during the times of their witch trials, which would be a very stressful time to have a baby.

The most interesting names I found were a couple of guys named Gysbert, and last names Krom, Schoohoven, and Longhaar.

I was up late with insomnia, mucking about on ancestry sites and fell down a rabbit hole of my dad’s mom’s mom’s family members, tracing them all the way back to 1600s New Netherlands/Dutch New York and New Jersey. Which I think is neat.

It’s so bad the fire alarms have been going off on the main floor all day.
Moral of the story is always clean your filters, don’t smoke Tina, and don’t do at home perms in a hotel.

This morning I woke up to a terrible, burning plastic/bleach smell that made my lungs burn and tighten. I thought someone was smoking meth or doing a home perm or both. Turns out it’s the hotel heaters.

Sometimes I think about the German Pizza Hut waitress I met ten years ago who I bonded with over our love of German-American midwest history. Hope she’s doing well.

First snow of the season!

Scared out of my mind what I’m gonna do after Tuesday. I hate this so much. I currently have three cents to my name. I’m trying to figure it out but I’m also thinking of just lying here and letting the November snow take me.

He’s looking for the Gouda.

I was not meant to be a king, I was meant to be midwestern. I was meant to eat cheese curds and “carmel” and pork tenderloin sandwiches and go Christmas shopping in Frankenmuth, I was meant to use a warsh rag and read Bradbury and listen to Sufjan Stevens and stand in awe of the Great Lakes.

I learned awhile back that it was the first major American studio film to center an Arab American family.

As a kid Thirteen Ghosts (2001) completely terrified me, especially the jackal, but as an adult it’s a comfort movie.

You and a few other friends are the reason I’ve been able to. That doesn’t escape me. 💙

To be far, that is pretty exciting. My city’s getting a new welcome sign right now, you’d think the popes coming to town.

YouTube video by evilgecko Alanis Morissette - Too Hot

No one:
Me: Remeber when baby Alanis made Paula Abdul music?

youtu.be/ar7afdfBHj4?...

I know! But have you ever had squeaky cheese (young cheese curds)? They’re delicious.

I’m packing my bag now!

I need Amish food. Buttered noodles, venison, rhubarb pie, fluffy bread, squeaky cheese, apple strudel, peanut butter pie. I need it.

Ooooooh 😮 I might need to pick up @merbearorin.bsky.social and stop by for a snack.

I’m tired of living in crisis. No matter what I do it’s not enough.

I’m grateful beyond measure for the help I’ve received from friends and strangers and I know I’m not owed anything, but there’s something soul-crushing about my family leaving us out to dry.