Breakfast 🍩☕️🍑

If you're overlooking pedophilia because you prefer bombing over grooming, your god is dead.

My radical leftist views are I'd rather have my tax dollars going toward saving and improving lives, not death and destruction. Crazy, I know.

You're welcome for the assist 😏

- me when I see someone liked a spicy pic in the middle of the night

Babe... wake up. You're gonna miss the beginning of World War 3.

I think I'm going to attempt going to sleep.

Wish me luck!

But I'll probably see you in 30.

Pretty rude to fall asleep before I do.

I forgot to eat a real dinner because I was high so I had a midnight sandwich.

Our adult son struggles with an insidious cocktail of OCD, ADHD, depression, and god knows what other neurodivergent thing. It’s not what people crack wise about. It’s real, it’s horrible, and it robs him of so many things we take for granted. Parents and loved ones, please know you are not alone.

Mom of an Autistic, ADHD, OCD, sensory processing disorder, non-verbal kiddo. Always feels like an island doesn't it? So grateful for the internet to show there's a whole community.

I see you 🩷

Please enjoy my posts until most of us are hunted down by AI-driven killer drones.

If you're not making a sandwich at midnight, did you even get high?

I haven't been brave enough to wear it until the last couple years. 🫣

I've been wearing glittery red lipstick all week like it was a requirement.

I wore these lips out in public today.

Because why the fuck not?

couple on tandem bike = 2 dui’s

It was like... instructions for the best picture? Why? 😑

I should go find things to do in Pittsburgh but doing things in cities means people and ew.

Does this mean I have a type? 👀

Which is pretty much all of them.

Except the pick-mes.

And the mean girls.

And the ones who willingly fuck MAGA bros.

I get it. Hot women break my brain, too.

Don't be the gross asshole that sends messages about pussy pics.

K thx.

One of my many skills 💅🏻

In 4th grade I kept riding my bike in front of my crushes house and crashed and I think it was the universe telling me not to be with someone named Tad

We're still discussing Santa's sex life if you're wondering about my commitment to a bit.

Email text:

We should be friends if you like random hot takes like this:

Nothing like the warm cozy feeling of being blocked by an account you didn’t previously know existed.

NGL text: I appreciate you and I miss you when you're gone. Im glad you're here [heart hands emoji]

Sharing this because it's sweet and it made me smile. And also maybe to prove that sometimes people like me.

If you listen very closely you can hear the groceries telling your kids college fund to go fuck itself

B as in Boy gotta be the most classic example

Anonymous messages! Anonymous messages!

I'm high and overly caffeinated.

✨️Dazzle me✨️