*nods head in agreement*
09.03.2026 20:12 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0*nods head in agreement*
09.03.2026 20:12 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Perhaps T-Rex’s were grumpy because they were not hugged by their moms
09.03.2026 13:15 — 👍 22 🔁 7 💬 2 📌 0Five secretions to get to know me by:
09.03.2026 17:49 — 👍 41 🔁 18 💬 1 📌 1Hold on, I need time to go back home and cover myself in egg yolk before I can go out again.
08.03.2026 22:01 — 👍 32 🔁 15 💬 2 📌 0IT'S FINE, YOU CAN HAVE IT, I DON'T WANT IT. ONE LESS HOUR TO BE SAD ANYWAY.
08.03.2026 16:33 — 👍 438 🔁 89 💬 6 📌 1Oh, hey, look at Jesus in his Crocs, hanging above the altar for all to bask in his comfortable glory.
07.03.2026 16:26 — 👍 44 🔁 17 💬 4 📌 0🤣
09.03.2026 19:13 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0There's something fucked up in the air, and I don't like it one bit.
09.03.2026 19:12 — 👍 18 🔁 8 💬 2 📌 0
🎶 traffic will tear us apart…
09.03.2026 18:12 — 👍 13 🔁 4 💬 1 📌 0📣📣📣
09.03.2026 18:09 — 👍 33 🔁 14 💬 2 📌 0
Me, joining yet another social media app:
- Yes, hello. This is my 24th rodeo and I still don't know what's going on.
Have the kind of sex where you have to buy a new house.
09.03.2026 10:42 — 👍 111 🔁 44 💬 10 📌 1if my pets did rise up and revolt my cat would 💯 be the leader and the dogs his grunts no question
09.03.2026 17:07 — 👍 32 🔁 8 💬 1 📌 0*eats a peanut butter and 50 mg black cherry gummy sandwich for lunch*
09.03.2026 17:48 — 👍 17 🔁 5 💬 1 📌 0You expect me to eat chia seeds?? The same seeds I use to grow my pets?
08.03.2026 19:19 — 👍 179 🔁 50 💬 8 📌 0Why did they call it French toast and not Gallic bread
07.03.2026 18:35 — 👍 92 🔁 31 💬 3 📌 0
Boss: how would you assess this situation?
Me: by being the best ass i can be
now would be an amazing time to be an astronaut not stuck on earth
09.03.2026 05:54 — 👍 36 🔁 12 💬 0 📌 2they should make a brain you can power down every evening with the push of a button
09.03.2026 05:32 — 👍 23 🔁 6 💬 1 📌 1
20’s: up late, popping mollies
40’s: up late, popping mellies (melatonin)
An hour less of this hellscape? I’ll take it!
08.03.2026 05:44 — 👍 35 🔁 16 💬 0 📌 0When she’s on her period, but he goes down on her anyway
08.03.2026 06:30 — 👍 20 🔁 7 💬 1 📌 0Accidentally locked myself out of my microwave trying to reset the clock. I guess it was nice having a working microwave.
08.03.2026 18:09 — 👍 23 🔁 9 💬 1 📌 0This is all so unnecessarily fucking stupid, and destructive.
09.03.2026 16:45 — 👍 18 🔁 8 💬 0 📌 0Rubbing two breadsticks together to try and light the pizza oven
08.03.2026 19:30 — 👍 44 🔁 15 💬 0 📌 0so was the daylight saved or is it gone forever?
09.03.2026 01:01 — 👍 37 🔁 11 💬 2 📌 0
Partial section of the face of a full-size chocolate cat being held over the face of an actual cat.
Phantom of the Opurra
09.03.2026 13:03 — 👍 1993 🔁 416 💬 26 📌 15The hour I lost yesterday was reserved for loving kindness. It's a shame really, for you-not me.
09.03.2026 16:06 — 👍 32 🔁 12 💬 1 📌 0
Another cover that I quite enjoy
music.youtube.com/watch?v=OBqg...
Here you go, @skeptyk.bsky.social! 💕
music.youtube.com/watch?v=sobv...