Adonis

Upper classer, asking St Peter: "Surely there must be a first class for us, in Heaven?"

St Peter: "Sort of. Hell."

Trump: I'm forcing them to fast. Yeah, I'm a saint.

Anna Wintour: instead of firing them, can I kidnap them and use their blood for my magical youth baths?

Still can't tell the difference, both groups are doing the same things as far as I can tell.

Cuomo: wow, look at the t*tties on Godzilla!

MAGA: wait... if Jesus offered salvation without a price tag, does that make him a socialist?

He cried about drinking beer during his confirmation hearings. So, no surprise.

And when the Nazis invaded, they turned off the surveillance by typing in "France" as a password.

Anna Wintour, when asked, is like, "I see no color behind these shades. But yeah, only keep whites on payroll please."

Only White* Teen Vogue

This is why I don't mind when Trump or others, bash journalists. Because respect is earned and journalists never earn it anymore.

Queen Marie Antoinette: "Let them eat cake!'

MAGA: "Heck no, cake is a luxury. You're too generous."

It'd be great if a single Democrat politician had the guts to sue. But they don't. They're weak.

Of all things to find outrageous, a subsidized bus is bizarrely small. So many places have buses covered. And NYC, with extreme traffic congestion? Incentivizing people to choose public transit instead of using their car in the crowded city makes sense regardless of not liking perceived "handouts".

Folks were shocked at this angle? They would have lost their minds if they saw the other side, Erika licking Vance's ear.

The obvious Halloween choice, Del Toro's Frankenstein, is scheduled to come out in November for some reason. So, sometimes it's because execs are self-sabotaging boneheads.

Never doubt the rigged script.

I thought the Jays were going to win, which made me question reality. Then the MLB made sure money still worked - and the world makes sense to me again.

I hear that MAGA hats are edible.

Money still works.

Dodgers on the phone to MLB: get these umps, in line! We want what we paid for!

Hope part of the Dodgers billion+ is spent on the umpires. Been helping them big time.

Imagine how much better the lives of people around Trump became when he got the outlet to fart his thoughts onto social media, instead of yapping in their ear.

Sue them hard.

"Deiseroth" looks like a Final Fantasy villain name if ever I saw one.

Plot twist: Adam started as Ava, transitioned to Adam. And Eve started as John, transitioned to Eve.

Tolkien: when I wrote about Souron turning the world to sh*t, I meant it to be fantasy. Not a prediction.

CBS has always been "Color? Bye Sucker!" Still seems to be.

Family. It refuses to learn to swim, sets the ship on fire, then begs you to risk yourself by helping them stay above water. Vote your way to shore, brother.

Trump won't try again until the month before the next Peace Prize announcement.