KrisBjornsen

I am not a complete idiot all the time. Just most of an idiot most of the time.

You ever get mad when you realize you are starting the last chapter of the book?

Wife:"Why not put your laptop bag on the stool in the corner?"
Me:"Because it can't fall off of the floor."

The geographical center of Vietnam is in Laos, and the geographical center of Laos is in Thailand

The "It's a photoshop"-brand family is proud to announce a new product line: "It's AI"! Still served with the same great "I can tell by the pixels" flavor.

Making a PB&J with the heels of the loaf is the inverse of an Uncrustable. Oops, All Crust!

i.imgur.com/GO8sHMF.jpeg

The day doesn't end at midnight. The day ends and the new day begins at about 3:30 AM. 2 AM is still yesterday.

There is no war in Ba Sing Se.

While you are out there, ticking boxes, I'll be over here, boxing ticks.

I love how, to an ambulance driver, the world isn't made up of roads. It's made of paths that take more or less time and are varying degrees of bumpy.

Text messages need to be schedulable. If I have a thought at 2 in the morning, I should be able to go 'Here's the message, but don't send it til a reasonable hour when humans are actually awake.' I don't want to wake you up with my random thoughts, but I'd love a response when we are both rational.

My favorite conspiracy theory is that everything is going to be okay.

Two words for your next storyline;
Monster farts.

There are literally no rules saying that your New Year's Resolution can't be for evil.