Eephus Tosser

I'm beginning to think it might be because I'm in L.A. and we have some strong local options, because I get Porto's delivered to my office at least once a month, too.

Every Friday, I make a list of who gave me value that week and every Monday I order flowers. I get a number of deliveries myself, but never Crumbl. Maybe now that Sprinkles is no more, though.

Maternal grandfather died before I was born, from injuries he sustained in World War II, where he was in a tank crew. He was also gay and he and my grandmother adopted two daughters (my mom and aunt).

Paternal grandfather was a prison guard. He was in the Army before that and also served in WW2.

It's like a cockroach, it just won't die.

Bottoms and feeders are two of my favorite groups of people to date.

Terrific work by this engagement panhandler. "Actually, you're all the stupid ones for thinking he knew the meaning of the permanent tattoo he paid someone to put on his body."

P.S. as a Jew, if you think that there are no anti-semites married to Jews—especially Jewish women—whoo boy!

When you get yelled at and your feelings are hurt, you should get to do a little assault, as a treat.

I'm not sure what you mean, but I send thank you gifts weekly.

Had my first Crumbl cookie and fucking gross.

I hate this.

If baseball has taught me nothing else...

And this man calls himself a Kennedy.

America versus Freeland sounds about right for 2026.

Mets counter by signing John Hodgman.

The good news is that it leaves Dallas just as quickly.

It's the bottom of the sixth and the eleventh pitcher (combined between both teams) is in the game.

Loathe as I am to hand anything to MLB, I would kill for a three-batter minimum right now.

Big West fever, baby. Catch it!

Four innings and four pitchers later, the Titans have a no-hitter going and lead 3-0.

You find someone—anyone—else to take that ball, and if you can't, then you immolate the ball and yourself on sight.

Or maybe you did!

As a once-athletic dude with a waistline and an age both barreling toward fifty, this is my greatest fear, and one reason why I am always happy to be behind the netting.

Man, you absolutely cannot come back from this. I would change my name and move to another county.

Starter Jason Krakoski got just four outs for CSUF, but one of them was a swinging K on Roch Cholowsky, so that's something.

It's fun to watch Gasparino hit dingers because he isn't even all that strong; he just uses his long levers and good bat speed so well.

Week 3 Evaluator’s Notebook: Western Michigan @ CSUN I spent Friday and Saturday at CSUN as the Matadors took on Western Michigan, and Sunday was spent watching Cal State Bakersfield against Texas Tech on ESPN+. Streaming notes differ widely from in-…

Publishing late this week, but the new Weekend Notebook is up, with thoughts on CSUN, Cal State Bakersfield, and Western Michigan.

bigwestdugout.com/2026/03/02/w...

The Bruins have six victories over ranked opponents, including a pair of run-rule wins. The Titans only have four wins on the season.

Tough midweek matchup tonight for Cal State Fullerton, who finally got their bats going this weekend against Xavier. They're headed to UCLA to take on the number one team in the country, who just handed No. 23 Texas A&M and No. 4 Mississippi State their first losses of the season over the weekend.

He rebuilt the military during his first term? The one that happened *before* Sleepy Joe Biden gave everything away?

Week 3 Evaluator’s Notebook: Western Michigan @ CSUN I spent Friday and Saturday at CSUN as the Matadors took on Western Michigan, and Sunday was spent watching Cal State Bakersfield against Texas Tech on ESPN+. Streaming notes differ widely from in-…

Publishing late this week, but the new Weekend Notebook is up, with thoughts on CSUN, Cal State Bakersfield, and Western Michigan.

bigwestdugout.com/2026/03/02/w...

I don't think he has much clue where any of his pitches are landing, but my toxic scouting trait is that I'd be sure I could fix him.