I think you only had Saturday tickets but double-check (I’m the friend)

Actually amazed at how they find new ways to fuck it up

Amazed at how well you’re moving!

This asshole is a goddamn renter not an owner. I hope his security deposit covers all of this.

There’s just so much at all times. My spoons are running out of forks to give.

So, similar to packing for an Indian wedding?

Now that I live in a normal nyc apartment, I too have been cursed now that heat is on and it’s a balmy 82 degrees in my home. I came in from an errand and immediately took off my pants.

Goddammit I don’t want to root for the Dodgers. #baseball

A precious baby who has never done a thing wrong in his life!

Laughing at myself because when I am forced to use copilot, i automatically say please and thank you because that’s just who I am. I hope when the robots take over they remember me as polite.

Yay! I can stop packing shorts to come over in the winter!

Do not threaten me with a good time.

Was it the greatest television series? No. But did it change my whole life? You better believe it.

Right? I keep thinking about that post that was like “some of you have been following each other for a decade” and I’m like, our friendship is almost old enough to rent a car!

Tweet about smallville premiering 24 years ago on October 16, 2001.

24 years ago!

Omg so annoying. Honestly i don’t think of slack or any of the messaging apps as real time tools so just tell me what you need. If it’s actually urgent where you need to talk to me right now either tell me that or freaking call me. Otherwise I will get to you when I can.

Happy Birthday Fox Mulder!

Read the first two hundred pages of Crime & Punishment and last two chapters and got a B+ but the real victory was the time I wrote my sisters college essay on Streetcar despite not reading it and asking her for a summary and got an A.

Can we fire Boone yet? #yankees

The problem is that we still need our bullpen to do their job and they remain a ??? #yankees

I love you Aaron Judge. #Yankees

Ok but why did I immediately picture Buck and Eddie?

The #Yankees are just unwatchable.

Fucking take a pitch #yankees

Pressing buttons is hard. You deserve a treat!

He’s just trying to drum up business! Happy birthday!!!

Holy fucking shit Cam Schlittler! #yankees

Jesus Christ #Yankees take a fucking pitch

wtf

She deserved a raise for her hard work!