Katie

*cat

I am also bad at typing every day

Misha’s defining qualities are Goodness, Roundness, and Squishiness.

This is not an April Fool’s post. I am a fool for this cast every day.

It has been zero (0) days since my cat last opened the bathroom door and barged in on me to share about his day in operatic tones

Fun fact: many captive raptors dislike men, because the male keepers get restraining duty when the vet comes

Equally fun fact: birds are as bad at sexing humans as we are at sexing birds and many believe that men with long hair are actually women (and thus acceptable)

This is the first full Ren Fair dress I’ve made and I love this thing so much

“And the people - ah, the people!
They that dwell up in the steeple -
They are neither man nor woman,
They are neither brute nor human,
They are ghouls!”

Person who just needs my demographics data to do their job: Right, so, our gender options are male, female, and other…

I’m eating brunch in the bar seating. The man and woman next to me are clearly on a first date. It’s not going well. I don’t think the man knows that it’s not going well. 😬

I stole Misha’s favorite chair. He’s been staring at me from the bed for the last half hour, waiting for me to do the right thing. I will not be doing the right thing.

The whole world runs on dopamine. People do interesting things in surprisingly large groups if we can make the dopamine go brrrr 🤷‍♀️

Misha is invisible under all of my blankets, but unbeknownst to him, he snores pretty loudly

He’s getting a B for Stealth

My cat is so perfect, look at his sleepy face and his little beans

not everything you love in your teenage years holds up but Green Day was cooking with American Idiot

Do not listen to anyone who tells you that the most important drow is Drizzt Do’Urden, it is CLEARLY Jarlaxle

Follow me for more valuable life tips

It is the sacred duty of Arizonans to remind our coworkers from other states that they could always have different problems. Not better problems, not worse problems, just different problems. Scorpions in your home versus shoveling snow is entirely a matter of personal preference.

The cats are in the living room watching Taskmaster while I, the human, work in my bedroom and do not watch Taskmaster. How did my life get to this point?

Much as I love naps, there is a point where one has in fact had enough naps and instead needs to eat something.

The point where one wakes up crying about a dream where pirhanas left the Amazon River and got sunburned?

Yeah, that’s over the threshold. Time to get up and eat.

“Some people make a big deal out of the whole misogyny thing…”

“Yeah, some people are literally women!”

- Actual conversations I’ve had with actual humans

If you ever want to learn to type with all your fingers, it’s actually a great approach for those of us with tremors. I’m able to rest my wrists on the desk or laptop and only move my fingers, so my aim is a lot better than it is using one finger

Make sure you take periodic breaks from the existential dread to pet a very soft cat

I spent 15 years wondering why I smelled skunks in Phoenix all the time, but never heard about anyone getting sprayed, before someone finally explained to me that the smell was pot.

I am a touch typer, which is a perfect illustration of the difference between semantic memory and skill memory.

I type without looking at my keyboard all the time (skill memory). But if you ask me where on the keyboard the letter “j” appears… no clue. May I interest you in words starting with “j”?

I do this with donuts

Every morning, I come back from breakfast to find that Misha has tucked himself in with the blankets I just abandoned. Every morning, he melts my heart. It’s good to have routines.

I fear there is deep truth here.

Completing the Cycle means giving the body a physiological experience that feels like we fought or escaped a predator so that the stress systems know to switch off. Things like exercise, beating up a pillow, or a good primal scream can create that experience.(2/2)

There’s a psychology concept called Completing The Cycle - our stress systems evolved for fighting and fleeing predators, not a never-ending pile of emails. Since there’s never a physiological feedback of “I have defeated enough emails for now,” systems don’t shut off (1/2)

If demons were smart they’d start with more low-impact possessions. Like I’m a hard no on all the vomiting and being a vessel for pure evil stuff, but if one of them was like hey why don’t you let me do these emails while you go take a nap I would literally throw him the keys to my corporeal form

I’m doing my human subjects research certifications right now, and I’m definitely not staring into the void, wondering if the legal protections I’m reading about are going to be gutted by the new administration.

Nope. Definitely not worried over the fate of the FDA.

Sharks haven’t lasted this long by sending emails immediately, and neither have I