Alt Chloe (she/her)

Man, when I finally have core stability and strength, it's all over for you bitches.

Coming out as a Dave Matthews Band fan was harder than coming out as bisexual.

I love a tight 90 minute movie and I really enjoyed KPop Demon Hunters.

But there was a lot of world building that I wish they would've explored more??

I'm sorry to the girl who was shooting her shot with some Broadway producers at Sardis and I started singing along. 💀😭🥲

People want to pay me for my art and it's weird.

Why do women's running sneakers only come in "kill yourself gray" and "rainbow tie dye aneurysm?"

Thinking about the time when my dad's reaction to my deep depression as a teenager was to hide his copy of the Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath.

No context ER.

"Fire on the Mountain" would be a very bad song for there to be a real fire during.

Truly the best thing I've ever said, coming off anesthesia, was, "My advice for hiring a new cardiologist? Don't hire someone whose name is a euphemism for penis."

"It's important to note that with physical therapy, it might get worse before it gets better...

Also, this condition is degenerative. So it only gets worse over time."

Why does he dye his eyebrows but not his beard?

Look at this photograph.

I need a candidate to run, who is really passionate about lowering the price of beef jerky.

Me: Maybe I don't have EDS??

Me, looking through photos from yesterday's BBQ: Oh... No, normal people don't sit like that.

One day you're young, the next you have an unexplained hatred for the grackles at your bird feeder.

My cardiologist putting me on Viagra is the funniest thing to ever happen to me.

*It'll potentially help lower the blood pressure in my heart and lungs.

No context texts I've sent to the group chat today:

I've been acting like I'm strong but the truth is I've been losing ground to a hospital too crowded.

No context texts I've sent the group chats today.

I was sensing a theme at the MFA yesterday.

Touching grass isn't enough.
But seeing a real Monet at the museum is.

My hot take:

If you're a vendor at a faire and you're mad at trinket traders because they're trading what you're selling; consider not selling drop ship temu items. 🤷🏻

I'm sure the previous owners thought an oak tree would look pretty out front. (And it does).

But I genuinely don't think my sinuses can take this.

There's a non-zero chance that the writers of ER read about me while doing research for a baby with HLHS.

And that's kinda neat.

When someone wants to commission you for art and you have no concept of what to charge.

Two things I hated as a kid:
1. Nap time
2. Bath time

Things I get cranky if I don't get now, as an adult:
1. Nap time
2. Bath time

It was truly enjoyable to sit and watch the circle pit from above, like --

I am with you in spirit, my comrades.
But my body now bruises if you look at me wrong.

Worcester Palladium should participate in the "actually mix in the vocals" challenge.

To whatever poor FBI worker is assigned to my Google search history: I have been watching a lot of ER medical dramas. Do not come for me.