🪱💀mindy💀🪱 [exorcism bondage era]

pull someone else's hair 😎

omg hi

dumpling daughter spicy sweet soy sauce

can anyone rec a dupe for this? it's sooo good but it's impossible to find locally and it is also expensive

a white girl with glasses and purple hair

proof of life

this was so fucking stupid I'm actually furious

there's lowkey nothing more beautiful than you and your best friend sending each other the same exact stupid joke at the same exact time🥲

a passage from a book with some bullshit about humans not being able to hear the noises bats make

this feels like a bizarrely bold thing to make up even for a fictional novel?!?

ppl STILL using substack: truly what the fuck? get your shit together

Congratulations Substack on your new partnership with Polymarket!

And to those publishing on Substack, is this really the tool you want from the folks who take part of your revenue?

oh i can't settle on a favorite anything

the fact that people can simply answer this question is unfathomable to me

coworker just got a call from her 53 year old daughter who is in the ER for something & listening to the way she talked to her & hearing her say how hard it is when your babies are crying & you can't be there just flung me into grief about how my own mom is fully NOT nurturing in that way

thinking about the time a guy and i were doing dirty texting (that he initiated!) and the entire time he just kept "no, but"-ing instead of "yes, and" -ing me

a graphic advertising max's patreon (patreon.com/interrobangbus) with max's head impaled on a stick. text surrounds it: INTERNET COMEDY! FIGHT LESSONS! ESSAYS! REVIEWS! STORIES! TRAUMA DUMPING! BOOK EXCERPTS! LIFE ADVICE! PODCASTS! WRITING GUIDES! COMICS! PUBLISHING SECRETS! LISTS! INTERVIEWS! SNEAK PEEKS! CRIES FOR HELP! LIES!

hi

www.patreon.com/c/interroban...

am i being stupid or does "subsequently" have no business being in this sentence? bc subsequently to WHAT??

sure

i just meant it's usually me specifically

a friend

tums taste like cheap hotel rooms

ya

how to fake a haunting by Christa Carmen

now reading

hannah: it's way too big and juicy and weird
brandi: that's what she said
me, rolling my eyes: oh, right, she said it's TOO big and TOO juicy and TOO weird. oh nooooo it's too big and too juicy and too weird oooooh nooooo
brandi: hehehehehehehehehehehehehe

greg davies bookmark

greg davies bookmark but HOLOGRAPHIC

one of my book club pals surprised me last night with a fucking holographic magnetic greg davies bookmark 😭

@garbagesauce.bsky.social & I are reading a story i wrote when i was 14 and stumbled upon the sentence "But these weren't your average ordinary house wife dildos" and now we cannot possibly move past this

Top ten surfaces to squirm on

finally an explanation for the hugeness of my bazongas

MAKE AN EMERGENCY DONATION to Trans Continental Pipeline right now.

They are a Colorado based org that helps trans people relocate there and they are overwhelmed with requests. CO borders KS, and TCP has the infrastructure to help get people out.

GO DONATE.

tcpipeline.org

omg why is this so genuinely heartwarming

infuriating to have been in therapy for years & be fully aware that my self esteem & self worth & belief in myself are so hilariously poor bc of the way i was spoken to by other people growing up & yet my own present day internal monologue speaks to me exactly the way those mfers did back then. lol.

fellas does it ever feel like you are simply never going to get Better or be a Real Person