Jake Reber

*sung to the tune of 'Sweet Child 'o Mine'
"Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven
Ev'ry day is NINE Eleven"

Learning Bach off a TAB is awesome cause realtalk: by the time any string player is done with a sheet of standardized notation the damn thing is basically a TAB anyway

As long as TAB includes rhythmic notation, it is a superior system (for strings) than Standard

Good time to play drums instead

Why are S'Mores never on the dessert menu?
I feel like pizza places could totally make a bitchin' S'more

My favorite part about hiring celebrities over voice actors is how obviously bored you can hear them get by season 3
Pairs nicely alongside the limited animation

Always blows my mind that Jim Henson's voice just sounded like that

Not sure if it's getting older or inflation but I used to feel naked if I didn't always keep a guitar pick in that jean's watch pocket but now I need 3 in there at all times to get thru the day

My greatest fear is that We lose the MidCity Mall, but the Comedy CaraVan somehow stays open

Imagine DJing a party that Matthew Broadrick is at and just continously spinning 'Last Kiss' by Pearl Jam

Tonight!

It's crazy to me that guitar education is so fixated on CAGED bluesbox 2-note per string across all 6 strings

Like, it's a PENTatonic scale, don't make harder than it has to be. Just play on the easy small strings that cut thru sonically and play maybe 1 or 3 note above & below the FIVE notes

I've decided to only practice brushes on drums from now on. I figure if I can do anything deece w/ a brush, can't be too much harder to do w/ a stick

Played my second ever 4 hour solo guitar gig
I got good feedback
I feel tired & very strong

Call me if you need some of that jazz bullshit

If elon is so smart then why fuck is everything so stupid?

taught 2 Upright Bass lessons yesterday. Taught a buncha piano, guitar, hell even a harmonica lesson in between, but it occurs to me that I'm not sure I've ever taught 2 Double Bass lessons in the same day before

Ah, skeet
Skeet
Goddamn.

Wikipedia says that #DC superhero B'wana Beast's secret identity is Michael Payson "Mike" Maxwell but how much funnier would it be if it was Howard Dean?

Yeah reality didn't have to be this fucking stupid but they had to have it all I guess

For sure, and I know the recipe but piano'll just always be tertiary to me and I'll never put in the work

Gentle reminder not to use "bootlicker" as an insult because it unfairly includes people who like to lick boots purely for pervert reasons ❤️

"UN-DER RA-TED"
*Clap
**Clap
***ClapClapClap

I follow the sage advice of my Bass elders & always rosin my bow downwards. Frankly I don't actually believe it makes a difference
At once point I rosin'd up & down I think that was the happiest I ever was, but that was also before Harambe became the nexus point of the breakdown of reality

‘After a certain age, every artist works with injury’. Marianne Faithfull

I watched the world trade center fall when I was 12 and literally nothing has ever gotten better

Everyday is 9/11

I graduated from high school nearly 20 years ago and my highest hopes for the future were that by now we'd be on the metric system & abolish daylight savings and whoooo boy were those hopes way too high I guess

There should be a handyman drag queen named Chanel Lox

Has #NPR gotten stupid enough that they could get #WWE to do a tiny desk match?
AKA a Boilen Room Brawl

That #KingoftheHill reBoot is totally bunk if they don't cannonize that Chuck Mangione assassinated the CEO of Mega-Lo Mart

Oh shit I keep forgetting I'm supposed to use this