The R2 Dude

AH! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS DOING HERE?!

One last thing, if you want to try a Bond movie and not sure where to start, don't do what I did. I would suggest starting with Goldfinger, The Spy Who Loved Me, Goldeneye, or Casino Royale.

Anyways, now to switch hyperfixations again.

And if anyone's curious, favorite Bonds:

1. Roger Moore
2. Sean Connery
3. Daniel Craig
4. Pierce Brosnan
5. Timothy Dalton
6. George Lazenby

None of them are bad at all. Dalton and Lazenby are really only at the bottom for having so little screentime.

Also now that you saw the ranking, no Man with the Golden Gun shouldn't be that high. But fuck it, I don't care, I loved that mess. From Russia With Love needs another watch by me as I was not in the right head space when watching it. Live and Let Die is low because I was very uncomfortable watching

Well, I finished No Time to Die. That's all the Bond films.

So... here's my ranking and the amount of new women Bond had sex with in each. Couple of notes: this is based of a single first time viewing (except Casino Royale and Goldfinger). I may have missed a girl here and there. This is subject.

I mean, I haven't been punched in a while so must be easier than you think.

Probably because you shouldn't go around punching ugly people.

Ok, I'll stop ranting. I do sincerely love Casino Royale and Skyfall as stand alone movies, and the first 2/3rds of Spectre were enjoyable. ...but man, I hope they learn some valuable lessons with the next era.

A spy using crazy gadgets to stop a cartoony villain in a volcano lair from using a massive space laser is fun. A real world government assassin killing foreign citizens to prevent his nations leaders from looking bad is just... not in the slightest. It gets dangerously close to Book Bond but a hero

There's hardly any gadgets, barely any absurd villains, and increasing real world elements. Which is KIND OF a problem for me when the main villain is a government agent given express permission to kill whoever he needs to in order to get the job done. It starts blurring the line and I don't like it

Like... when did you two fall in love?! Why?! Fucking HOW?!?! Was the sex scene supposed to show that, cause, uh, news flash: Bond has had sex a LOT and truly fallen in love like two times max in both continuities.

While I'm ranting I am increasingly uncomfortable with the realism of the Craig era.

And then, when all the elements are there, they have Bond retire? The fuck is the message here? The fuck is the POINT here? Yes, I obviously know there's one more Bond film, but I also am aware he DOES start that film retired.

And don't get me started on how sudden and jarring Spectre's ending was.

And Spectre showed how James Bond learns of his greatest nemesis and the main terrorist organization he's known for fighting... right before ending with him seemingly retiring to be with a girl he just met. You see the problem, right? They spent 4 movies establishing all the Bond elements.

I think here's my main problem: Casino Royale is a masterful story of how James Bond became the James Bond we know. Quantum of Solace was a shit story of how James Bond got over the events of the first movie to become the James Bond we know. Skyfall ended with the MI6 gang finally assembled.

Ok, so... tomorrow I watch No Time to Die and end the Bond series. But after Spectre last night... I gotta just say something.

I think the Craig era is a bit of a misfire. Don't get me wrong, Craig himself is great, and Casino Royale and Skyfall are AMAZING movies. But there's some huge flaws.

Though it was after they weren't allowed to use Blofeld, so they don't call him by name in that movie when they killed him off.

Oh, they killed off Blofeld in one of the older movies. Since the Craig movies are a reboot this was the first time this Blofeld showed up.

Yeah, it's James Bond still.

Yeppers!

...oh, I am never saying yeppers again.

Head of the terrorist organization SPECTRE and Bond's arch-nemesis in the Connery Bond films (and the single Lazenby film). Due to stupid copyright battles they had to stop using him and SPECTRE after 1971 or so, and they didn't get the ability to use them again until the mid 2010s. So this was big.

Phil Ken Sebben.

Phil Ken Sebben.

Hyperon...

...wait, what? When did... when did THIS happen?!

I was loving the first hour and 45 minutes of Spectre, but then it like hit a wall or something and fell WAY down.

...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ok, funny joke, now where's the real Blofeld? ...oh. Oh, no...

Someone mod the game to replace his voice with Archer quotes.

...Agent Under Fire's James Bond looks like Archer. That's hilarious.

I watched Never Say Never Again last night and... didn't like it.

I don't know... what's your favorite adaptation of Thunderball?

Fucking finally, beat Goldeneye Reloaded.

Not sure if I liked it more or less than Goldeneye 64. I liked it differently. Like... it almost feels wrong to compare the two.

I DON'T KNOW! It keeps randomly killing me!