Dean Shaffer

The cat was out of place, so he had it killed, plainly

(I read it the same way the first time or two...)

In my experience, they sleep primarily as one of your hands holds them on your shoulder, and the other hand plays Civ 6 because you can't lie down without waking them up.

Well, well, well, look who read the news.

The last anti-50 mailer I got was reduced to arguing that ballot initiatives are expensive so we should just reject them on principle 😂

The book scared the hell out of me when I first read it, so maybe there?

"Gradients of Grievance"??? Sometimes, Economist, the alliteration just isn't worth it.

Woke up with the sun rising already! Standard Time rules.

It was an outstanding save

My name is Jennifer Wolff. You killed my father. Prepare to win my electoral support.

Make the prosecutors use their strikes on you! Different systems have different rules, but if pro-defendant jurors uniformly stay out of the pool, what's left?

The crowd did not disperse, an instead started playing Tubthumping by Chumbawamba — I get knocked down, but I get up again.

Principal Skinner saying, " Am I so out of touch with the Catholic church? No. It's the pope who is wrong."

Is that the exclusive remedy? Does it bar other tort remedies?

A still from the movie Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery. After Austin denies owning a swedish-made penis enlarger pump and related accessories, he is being presented with a book, "Swedish-Made Penis Enlarger Pumps and Me: (This Sort of Thing Is My Bag, Baby) by Austin Powers"

"He said that that's not his"

Force out at home, I think, with the ball coming out of the glove and hitting the wall before being caught (so no out there)

But really, have you ever read Aristophanes' plays mocking Euripides, after reading the latter for a semester? Comedy GOLD (that I wouldn't for the life of me understand now)

This quote should be central to Dems' messaging. Even if Bessent doesn't think he means this, Republicans are punishing, and threatening to continue to punish, Americans until we accept the new monarchy.

A formative experience for my 7-year-old self

(And for those who, being cheapskates like me, just click away upon encountering a paywall, it turns out to only be $3 a month!)

This pushed me to finally subscribe, just thought you should know

I thought "officially questionable" was a designation reserved for DHS affidavits

Did she specify whether it was their biological families, or are we talking about their Russian "families"?

Here’s video of the incident

Might be recency bias, but I think you could scratch "in my lifetime" and still be right.

Life-of-a-Showgirl-tier poem

Did Eulalie played TE for the Chiefs, too?

For insufficiently frequent Taco Bell consumption?

Good news! The one on Bethel is still around.

hoggys.com

Is the last one truly gone? Sad to hear it. They catered my wedding, and it was awesome.

(Also, this is a very unfair comparison to your situation, because Hoggy's / Chile Verde were invariably better than the new places)