Deputy Funk

We're at the point where I contemplate putting on Sabres game replays while I'm doing chores.

Can't beleive I was worried about the Sabres coming off of the Olympic break.

Sabres so good they're starting to get the questionable calls.

Florida NHL teams; thugs and assholes

Why can't there ever be good fascism? Authoritarianism with kindness?

So sick of person talking to camera.

Sabres hockey back

Rep Al Green (D-Texas) being escorted out of the SOTU for holding a sign reading "Black people aren't apes" basically sums up everything you need to know about MAGA and the USA.

Turned SOTU off after about a half hour, took the dog out, got blazed, and am going to watch the new episode of Family Guy, like a real American

Are they just going make the team stand on the stairs the whole time?

Kash Patel being in the USA men's locker room is a disgrace. Using anything and everything for personal gain and personal pleasure. Absolute ghouls.

$200 for the loudest, longest fart possible.

Remember when it was great the microchip had been invented?

OT in medal hockey games should not be 3 v 3. Probably none of the elimination games, really.

Watched the end of the men's gold medal hockey game on my phone in a Walmart, which feels pretty American to me.

Finally able to get back to hating all players except Buffalo Sabres.

If Tage misses any Sabres games I'll never forgive the Olympics.

Earlier I was thinking about how great it will be when I can full on hate them again

Have Olympic hockey on my phone at my desk and the new ANTM doc between period breaks, like any real man should.

U! S! A! (but only the women's hockey team) U! S! A! (not the actual country or the turds running it) U! S! A! (this cheer doesn't feel right)

Every instance of AI getting shoved down our throats makes me think of the scene in Idiocracy where Thomas Haden Church is panic screaming how Brawndo's stock fell and an automated layoff program just automatically started laying everyone off.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

*deep breath*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

*deep breath*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...

He was making these Frankenstein's Monster noises and motions, trying to get his granddaughter to laugh. Might sound weird, but I feel grateful I got to see that moment. An unguarded, human moment from an icon. Being next to him for even a short amount of time was amazing. Such presence. R.I.P

A while back in Chicago I worked in a small building. 6 floors, I think. Mixed business and residential. I got on the elevator one day and, next stop, in walked Jesse Jackson with his son and granddaughter. I was speechless. I definitely did not expect that during my workday.

Somewhere in the infinite expanse of the universe is another planet exactly like ours except called Orth.

Wank myself with a single finger, Captain Hook

...I'll never do those" and you keep repeating that pattern until you're 112% complete at 1 am and just jump right into Pantheon 5.

...I'll never do those" and then you do the ridiculous thing and think "well I was able to do that one ridiculous thing so I bet I can do the next ridiculous thing but not the even more ridiculous things...

The problem with Hollow Knight is there is a list of ridiculous things and you say "I'll do this thing but I won't do those ridiculous things" then you do the thing and think "well I was able to do that thing so maybe I can do this one ridiculous thing but not the other more ridiculous things...