John

I think you're still good enough to finish 3rd but Motherwell are closing in.

defence dain tam?

What a goal

They need to stick some Scottish fitba on, this Wolves v Aston Villa match would get football stopped.

'well, you don't have to watch it'

Shut up.

Still at work at half 2 on a Friday

Big bird you see in the park. No column needed.

I know this family voting thing has nuances and issues but on a general level, for decades, families in Scotland inherited the Labour party like they did their football team. That was VERY different though.

Deadline day is for mugs

Watching an old taggart and the polis guy was outside a house watching a guy inside the house wielding a knife. He sneaks in the door and basically says 'right come on, that's plenty' and the guy gives up the knife.

I'm so used to US TV that I was wondering why the polis didn't get his gun out.

an account called Lorraine driver says 'It's a vote to split the Labour majority and hand it to frog face' Chris Boyd replies with 'hi lorraine I'm here as a representative of 'things that age really well or really badly' company and, well, how do you feel about the latter Lorraine: please fuck off Chris: I'll put a tick next to I've felt better'

Hahahahahahaha

cc @paperghost.bsky.social

I would also like to add the common complaint about the city centre, 'there are roadworks and building works everywhere, they should invest and fix the city'

What do people think this work signifies?

Ciabatta was invented in 1982

That is way too recent to be inventing new breads

'na, i'm alright on the bench actually'

Scottish football journalists are rotten. Asking the celtic goalie if he wants to be number 1. What's he meant to say?

Tomorrow's back page: Goalie: I want Kasper's position.

Any Old Firm fan when a supporter of another team celebrates a win.

'burns night' is every night for the dedicated reply guy.

a classic sport

A sport requires a change of shoes.

Fair to say this pub has been Andy Murrayed by the curling. Old boy walked in 'how're we getting on at the stanes, son?'

Watching a bit of the Ice Hockey and if they want to win, they need to get the puck out wide and get quality crosses into the mixer.

Houseguest Just Going To Lie There Until Rest Of House Wakes Up

Houseguest Just Going To Lie There Until Rest Of House Wakes Up https://theonion.com/houseguest-just-going-to-lie-there-until-rest-of-house-1819571350/

-… then if you check table 6 it will tell you how many points you get for your age. Add those points to the ones from your Relatives-aboard cards and Family-elsewhere cards…
-Um, Eric, the water's getting pretty high.
-Then stop interrupting! Next, you'll need your dice and the saving throw chart.

Minimalism is a racket. It’s just big small trying to sell you more less.

What a goal

Game of fitba in Glesga

a ricki lake screenshot of a very 90scoded man named mike. the lower third says he “WANTS TO TELL HISVALENTINE CRUSH SHE HAS "BODACIOUS BAZONGAS"

happy valentine’s day

A two-panel Little Bubbie Child comic. Top panel is the little bubbie child asking, "Dad, hwat was it like a livin' in the 90s?" Bottom panel is dad responding, "Sometimes you'd open a can a peanuts and they'd come snakes outta there."

‘I Could Totally Do That,’ Says Correct Man Watching Luge Event

‘I Could Totally Do That,’ Says Correct Man Watching Luge Event https://theonion.com/i-could-totally-do-that-says-correct-man-watching-luge-event/

It's been 1 hour and I've gone from 'could this intervention lead to Starmer getting ousted?' to 'could this intervention lead to Sarwar getting ousted?'

Superb patter.

Anas Sarwar: