Fred Teifeld

She said “I’ll follow you anywhere”. I responded “No, we will walk together” and we melted into one.
#love

Andrew Taint looks like an unfinished amateur waxing job of a cold testicle.

Yes, I said Taint.

Patel continually looks like his proctologist used the whole fist.

Spot on. I have a nice little side hustle that allows me to enjoy my photography as an art first, income generating second.

I think Hegseth would make a great one time use as a land mine detector.

Kash Patel looks like his proctologist used the whole fist.

Bwahaha!

One seriously ugly spider. Some kind of Orb Weaver from what I can find but I could be wrong. In the meantime, enjoy! #naturephotography

Morning motivational issue: I keep forgetting about my coffee.

Last night I popped two Tylenols’.

DO I NEED TO GET CIRCUMCISED AGAIN?
#tylenol

Wow. I was actually surprised by this one: A MAGAt that I walked away from a few years back recently sent out a group email promoting an event celebrating the dead shitstain Charlie Kirk.

Just makes me even happier that I don't share air with MAGATs'.

#motorcycles
Just watched a kid pull up on a motorcycle. No helmet, not even eye protection but he was wearing over the ear headphones.

Good luck, kid. You’re on the express path to proving Darwin’s Theory.

I’m actually surprised he didn’t have a “Punisher” tattoo.

I still think she’s doing it because she fears losing her next election.

Jackpot on this morning’s “hunt”. Also, please President Rumpleforeskin, save us from these obvious dangers. They’re here and Chicago and we’re just SO scared. #nature #naturephotography #fredteifeld #photographybyfredteifeld #2025

Came across this guy at the end of one of my morning forest walks. Taken with my Nikon D850 and the Nikon 80-400 VRII. #nature #naturephotography #fredteifeld #photographybyfredteifeld #2025

I pissed off two scammers at the same time. Here are their profiles and have fun! #scammers #scam

Just a few from my recent walks in the woods near my home. #nature #naturephotography

R.I.P. Jim Lovell. Truly an American hero. I had the distinct honor to meet and speak with him a few years ago.

It’s experiences like that is why I really don’t give a damn about celebrities.

#automotive #automotivephotography #classiccar #fredteifeld #photographybyfredteifeld #fredteifeld.com

A selection of images I shot for a client back in 2014. It’s a replica of a Porsche 550 Spyder. Shot by me with a Leica S2 Medium format DSLR and lit by some fantastic, high quality gear by a no longer relevant manufacturer.

Airbus? No proof readers? 0 credibility as a news source.

Paramount Plus: CANCELLED

FASTER THAN A SPEEDING SHART! MORE POWERFUL THAN A PRESSURIZED SEPTIC TANK.....ITS.......

SUPERMAGAT!

My eyes cramp whenever I see a portrait where the image has been edited to the point of death and beyond that they look like they're CGI instead of human.

I’m actually kind of torn on that one. Both would be useful, IMO.

#nature #naturephotography #fredteifeld #photographybyfredteifeld

Every morning after breakfast I go for a nice walk in the local woods for a bit of exercise and what I call “hunting”. I just use my camera to “shoot” my objectives. These two were within 20 feet of me, so I shot them. It’s ok, I’m a professional 😜. Nikon D850/Nikkor 80-400 VRII.

Taken by me just a couple of days ago. Chicago during sundown, from the locks that separate the Chicago River from Lake Michigan. Multiple shots with a Leica D-Lux7, assembled in Photoshop, seasoned with just a little bit of editing.