✶ ✶ Professional Professional ✶ ✶

Y’all. Is Obama in cryosleep with Hari Seldon or something?

As a Chicagoan. I love watching this race and having my kids tell me I go faster than these guys in a minivan on those same streets.

The Mamdani Columbia story is an example of a microgenre where ethnic communities have had complex internal conversations about identity for generations and white people pratfall into them to go "what the fuck, why are you trying to trick me"

Laura Loomer‘s tweet: Alligator lives matter. The good news is, alligators are guaranteed at least 65 million meals if we get started now.

The entire Latino population in the U.S. is 65 million. She means all of us.

You a Nick Digilio fan? His commentary whenever this happens is elite.

Thank You!!! I’ve been unable to find this. Probably because I couldn’t remember the year.

I am so glad i didn’t hallucinate this memory. I’ve looked online for this clip for years and…nada

A hand holding a toy plastic trash can in front of a toddler playing on the sidewalk

in my city which is apparently in a state of extended military occupation due to extreme and widespread unrest a really kind sanitation worker saw me sitting out front with my kids and gave them free toy trash cans and we talked about recycling

LAPD fired rubber bullets at Australian journalist @laurentomasi.bsky.social

Man. I had a whole project in grad school about this.

Then they cut my funding.

Wait. Why have I never seen PCA at Ridman’s. I need to go there even more often.

To win reelection in 2029, Pope Leo needs to spend less time talking about poverty in Peru and more time focusing on the kitchen table issues that white working-class Catholics care about.

Wait Sheamus v Austin Theory? 2023 called. It wants its match back. #wwe #raw

Doofenshmirtz isn’t evil. He’s just a smart dude who needed therapy.
-Tico

They were working on a fan in my block. Great work done by some fine folks.

I will be there. Let’s go boys. #WxmAFC

Pritzker: Trump is lying to you

Walz: I'm working things out with Canada

Newsom: Smoooooth right wing chat 😉

old Soviet joke for our times:

Guy stops by the newsstand every day, scans the front page, doesn’t buy the paper. One day the vendor asks what he’s up to.

Guy says: “looking for an obituary.”

Vendor says “those are towards the back of the paper, comrade.”

Guy says: “not the one I’m looking for.”

He deserves every bit of it but I don’t know how Drake can watch anything on tv at any time and not be worried about this. He turns on Bluey and the dad is like “you know who I’d never let babysit you?”

Tico and I were watching "Welcome to Wrexham" a few years ago and he said

"Dad, you should totally do a class on the difference between US and UK supporter cultures."

So I did.

And now the class has tickets to actually see a @wrexhamafc.co.uk match! So excited!

I often think about how the egg prices at the farmers market have not changed at all. weird!

YouTube video by cubbymark Steve Goodman: A Dying Cubs Fan's Last Request

Came home to a Cubs game on TV. It’s time.

And yes.

We do.

Hey @obviousshirts.bsky.social we clearly need some Steve Goodman themed shirts.

Happy to consult. ;)

A screenshot of an email notifying Spotsylvania parents that funding for a program for youth with disabilities has been canceled

the richest man in the world has decided that your kids don't deserve special education programs

Watching the "Homicide" with Steve Buscemi as the suspect who keeps talking about average racial IQ differences and this guy written to be the ultimate off-putting creep in the 90s really is just the average person the vice president of the United States follows in 2025.

Can you imagine how crazy the podcast scene would’ve been back in Ancient Greece like welcome back to the cave, I’m your host Plato

Mahomes just bundled a pick with a TD

But like really. How big is that band. You’re already at 186 with the trombones and coronets. I’m assuming that the thousand reeds is an exaggeration.

Oh no. I've reached "Cracker's Euro Trash Girl" makes me wistful years old.

Received a letter from POTUS today purporting to remove me as Commissioner and Chair of the FEC. There's a legal way to replace FEC commissioners-this isn't it. I've been so fortunate to serve the American people and stir up some good trouble along the way. That's not changing anytime soon.

Welcome to the family. Let us know when you make it to Chicago. A whole lot of us want to buy you a drink. Or a bag of peanuts from the guy at the bus stop.