Clinton Reese

Thank goodness they're only showing him from the waist up so we don't have to see his raging boner. Cotton's wanted to turn Iran into a parking lot for *YEARS*

I'll bet Bari Weiss has already sent an email to Ellison demanding that John Oliver's show be shit-canned.

LMAO the President is asking SCOTUS to rehear the case? That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works. What a stupid jackass.

And if you don't think Bari Weiss has an email demanding John Oliver be fired saved in her drafts folder, I have a bridge to sell you.

The thing I'm worried about is that they're also going to own HBO, and I could easily see them shit-canning John Oliver.

And if I'm drunk *AND* angry? Buckle the fuck up, sunshine.

And I could definitely foresee this being the end of John Oliver's show on HBO, too.

Colonel Sanders to examine how all these dead chickens got here.

Man, when you look at the list of athletes awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom, Hellebuyck is gonna stand out in a real "One of these things is not like the other" on Sesame Street kinda way 🫤

TIL there are Dr. Pepper flavored Tic-Tacs 🤣

He'll ramble on and on and the major outlets will praise him for not shitting himself.

Yeah, it was gonna be a rough season without Halliburton as is, but the injuries that have seemingly hit *EVERYBODY* else, too, it's been even rougher.

JACK HUGHES WITH THE GOLDEN GOAL!!!

Finally got around to watching One Battle After Another. I know it's supposed to be a bit of satire, but damn if it doesn't strike a little too close to reality.

I feel that if you encounter someone who claims to have it all figured, you should just turn around and walk away. You're not dealing with someone living in reality. We all knew that one guy (and yes it's always a guy) in college who always thought they were the smartest one in the room.

Growing up in the backyard, pretending you're up at the plate in the bottom of the 9th in a tied Game 7 of the World Series, and you hit a home run to win it? Yeah, Bill Mazeroski actually did that. RIP to a Pirates legend.

Truth is stranger than fiction and what not.

Cute political theater. A man with a long history of stiffing people is suddenly going to actually pay? C'mon.

We should, but we won't. Remember who this bastard is. Notorious reputation for stiffing people. Ain't gonna happen.

Starting each broadcast day with the Star-Spangled Banner? Do these fuckers really think stations actually sign off anymore like they used to?

Nah, he's gonna wait until the Olympics are over. Kinda like how his man-crush Vlad waited until the 2022 Games ended before going into Ukraine.

@muellershewrote.com No Beans Talk on YouTube today?

So much winning 🤦‍♂️

I mean, it's basically liquid bread, so I'd say go for it 🙂

LEGEND.

Fuck did I need this this morning

6, and not just because that's the team I'd be on. I mean, Wisconsin alone could probably beat the rest of the teams.

I feel like the stupidity and incompetence would be hilarious if they weren't getting people killed 😑

The first line that came to mind after hearing that Robert Duvall passed away was from Days of Thunder:

"I want you to go out and hit the pace car."

"Hit the pace car?"

"Hit the pace car!"

"What for?"

"You've hit every other goddamn thing out there, I want you to be perfect!" 🤣

Hell, my dentist texts me two weeks out and I think that's early. Yeesh.