𝐌𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐪𝐮𝐞 ™

Don’t fall in love love, fall into working hard and worrying about yourself more. Stop putting others over yourself. A hard lesson we all have to learn one way or another.

I chose you now and in every lifetime.

Everything changes.

Goodbye My Lover James Blunt · Back to Bedlam · Song · 2005

open.spotify.com/track/6gxycj...

goodbye Billie Eilish · WHEN WE ALL FALL ASLEEP, WHERE DO WE GO? · Song · 2019

Never let your guard down.
Be as thick as the bricks on the foundation of a house.
Don’t settle for anything…

open.spotify.com/track/3LgWsm...

Does anyone else wanna take a go at it? Maybe try stabbing me in my side too. May bleed out quicker.

a close up of a woman 's face with swifterpics written on the bottom right ALT: a close up of a woman 's face with swifterpics written on the bottom right

I’m silenced into peace. There is nothing left to me anymore but a sliver of the soul that use to live inside this carcass. Nothing but ice will remain around this heart.

As I mourn I know one thing is for sure, love isn’t great. It only opens you up to vulnerable situations and I will never do that again. I’m done with all of this civilization. This is the last time anyone will ever hurt me again. I don’t want anyone ever again. I hope my heart stops and ~

As I say goodbye my heart is literally breaking into a million pieces. But it’s the thing I have to do. I can’t be someone’s doormat or used for fun when they they decide they can’t handle me.

It was. The people from there will bleed into here eventually and tear it down. We can’t have a safe space place anymore and people just suck.

Bluesky is so much better than Twitter.

That's the post.

I’m gonna hole away for a while and grieve my breaking heart. I will post a heartbreaking solo on Jasmine when I can think straight again and hopefully find myself healed enough to post it and not in pain. I pray the pain will be less today…

Have a nice Saturday.
Be well everyone. 😢

You hurt me and Karma will be at your doorstep one day and you’ll wish you never hurt someone like me. I’m loyal and so kind, I may have episodes sometimes where negative thoughts come into my head but this isn’t manic depression talking, this is clarity.

I’m done.

I hope you’re happy now.

to another soul again. I hope you no longer have anymore convenient stomach viruses, that apparently can lead you to twitch, or back on Twitter on Alter accounts, fucking around on me. It’s cool. You don’t owe me a damn thing. I just hope you know when bad things happen in your life, you deserve it.

presence is no longer wanted. I’m good. Thank you for some of the nice memories I had, an almost fairy tail I could gush over for hours and I’ll always have our story here to read and exist in that little moment, where nothing can harm me ever again. I am a sealed vault and I’ll never open up ~

you did it’s only to give you some credibility but I don’t trust them or you. Or anyone you associate with that would try to steal mates and etc. You weaved, a web all your own and I hope you’re happy. I hope you never get another headache again. I will never beg or even stay somewhere where my ~

the truth. But he does now. I took care of that to be kind enough to warn him of your evil intentions and how much of a liar you truly are. I should have never ever trusted you. Never speak or say a word to me again. Go back to your “friends” the one you didn’t leave and if they come back and say ~

“I can’t go one day without something.” You have never said that to me before, but I know who use to say it. Who would use my mental illness against me, abuse me silence when I thought it was love, you sought control. To keep me off Twitter so that the person you took from me there will never know ~

captivated by your words, your lies. I blame myself most of all for doing this again, trusting someone and being proved right. That people suck and all they do is lie, chest, manipulate and then when you react to their absence or disrespect they blow up on you and say, ~

and if you use it against me to make me look even worse, I don’t care. Go for it. I tried so hard to be patient, to understand but you just gaslighted me and made me feel bad even when I’d catch on and question you. You’d say stop looking for faults… now that was my gut trying to warn me but I was ~

get into your head but I see you writing wiyh people who want to steal you but you have the nerve to say nobody will steal you from me? Yeah, okay. Cool. Like I said. I am done. You made your bed, now lie in it. And don’t you dare say you dropping your friends for me was for me, you did it for you ~

stupid to not realize you play all three characters plus half the RPG is all you and a few of your friends and their friends. I’m glad I could make your RPG popular. There is absolutely nothing you do anyone can say. I did make my mind up now and I’m done. To the fullest extent. You say, you ~

just a pawn in your agenda to ruin my reputation, yet again, use me a way to garner sympathy, while everyone thinks I am mean and you can play the victim card to gain attention. I’m tired. I’m exhausted. All I’ve done is cry the past 2 weeks trying to wrap my head around how I could be so damn ~

not good enough to be honest with. That you couldn’t just cut the strings before we had our first Christmas together. I know it wasn’t in person but that message you sent me, on Christmas was the best thing I ever read out loud to anyone. I even cried. My heart felt so full only to realize I was ~

the girl you actually love, truly wanted to be with IC and OOC came back. I was made to believe we’d have a future together but that was my hope in the back of my mind, but deep down I always knew you’d never ever fully trust me. It’s why I always had my spells of depression, feeling like I was ~

implying like I’m the crazy one for noticing the short and divide. You said nobody would ever come between us. I have all our message between us. Moments and memories I’ve had to reread lately only to realize how dumb I’d been all along. The joke was always on me. I was just a placeholder for when ~

sudden you don’t want me, don’t want to even be near me even while you are sick. Couples are there for each other especially when they love each other like we use to in the beginning. You found someone better. I get it, I wish you would have just been honest and tell me the truth. To stop ~

The excuses don’t matter anymore, your lies and the one liners are all you. I always pour my heart into every response and reply. Whether it was IC or OOC which you initiated to begin with but then you go on your alters and say how I’m always wanting sex. You’d say you like me naughty but now all ~

Sickness just conveniently happened after you made several alters for the girl who said something mean to me, I defended myself and was left to feel like I had to leave the group rpg. I would have followed you anywhere in life, been your rock and your heart. But you fumbled me for the last time.

I’m grateful for the experience cause now I know I can ever trust you nor did I ever in the beginning but I gave you the benefit of the doubt. Now I sit back and laugh at my naivety and cry when I think about how you shattered my heart into pieces and you don’t even care. It’s about you and your ~