I Ate Oklahoma

Also, which magazine said flat butts are the thing? I'm not doubting somebody did, but let's not pretend it was a majority opinion.

Looking back on it, the butts weren't even that big.

This guy looks like he has several children who have gone no contact with him.

Ah, yes, the kind of brilliant mathematical mind that can run a casino into the ground.

"If the government hadn't taken my money, I'd send the taxes to Argentina myself!"

"The great thing about tariffs is they helped me cut back on overspending on luxuries like pants and meat."

"As if I'd want anyone BUT Melania negotiating with Putin."

Other fun convos I expect tonight:

"You know, we SHOULD lose medical insurance. We've been taking advantage of big pharma for too long."

"Nothing would make me prouder than armed military personnel checking my ID at every street corner."

"Who is this Naughty Rabbit fellow, anyway?"

Kind of super looking forward to hearing old people at the high school football game tonight trying to convince each other that hosting a Qatari military base is "America First."

Stop at Kendall's in Noble on the way for a chicken-fried steak (the most supernatural of all steaks) or grab a pizza from Jo's Famous Pizza in Purcell. Either way, go support women, STEM, and Dennis.

Pam Bondi has the personality of someone who has to pay for sex and the face of someone who has to kick in extra for the paper bags.

I've noticed the opposing team's fans only cheer when the opponents score on us. To win those fans over, I recommend we score on ourselves repeatedly; that will surely make them so happy they'll start supporting us. And I'm sure all our fans will keep cheering for us—who else is there to cheer for?

People are still mulling over philosophers born before printing, so, yeah, I think it's okay to keep pondering a discussion from a week and a half ago.

The only way to delude yourself into thinking Trump is an agent of peace is to ignore everything he's ever said and done.

The idea of Donald "Jan. 6" Trump winning a Nobel Peace Prize is so ridiculous on its face that it really puts on display how thoroughly brainwashed his followers are that they a) thought he had a shot and b) are upset he didn't win.

Epic handshake meme. Artificial intelligence and artificial sugar bonding over being noticeably worse than the real thing and giving cancer.

Just drink a real soda and use your real brain.

A good way to tell if someone is legitimately insane is if they thought Trump had a chance at winning a Nobel prize.

The funniest part about this incredibly dark and depressing time is that this absolute nitwit keeps bragging about passing a test that is usually given to dementia patients . . . because he's a dementia patient.

Dude comes in at the 11th hour to be slightly less shitty and people act like he's a changed man.

No. Just because other people are more awful doesn't make him good, it just makes him slightly less awful, which is still more awful than anybody wants.

#FuckICE

Do you think he's dumb enough to open a crate marked "NOBEL PEACE PRIZE" if you sent it to the White House?

I bet he is.

The fact that I know who both of them are makes me so angry.

YouTube video by ParticleMen When Will You Die? - They Might Be Giants (Official Video)

This song just keeps getting more relevant (and applicable to so many more people) every damn day. Thank you @tmbg.bsky.social.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSQ8...

I refuse to acknowledge any prime day that isn't on the 2nd, 3rd, 5th, 7th, 11th, 13th, 17th, 19th, 23rd, 29th, or 31st.

"People don't like me" isn't cancellation, but you'd never know that from hearing Matt and Bari drone on and on.

Y'all got any of them water drugs?

To add another layer to the struggle, she has bad flare-ups when she eats domestic wheat products, so pasta and bread are generally out.

Honestly, about all I've got are egg bites and making chop salads she can dump dressing on, but even that step can be too much, because ADHD is INSANE.

Food people, I need some ideas.

My wife needs meals that are so easy to eat that she can't not eat them. She works a ton and the jobs sap her brain of the ability to make basic decisions about food.

I'm looking for dishes:
- w/ protein
- w/ veggies
- microwavable
- good cold

It's National Taco Day and, in many ways, that is the only thing keeping me going today.

Sounds like Republicans ought to get all the Republicans who form the Republican majorities in the Republican-led House and the Republican-led Senate together to pass the budget that Republicans wrote with the Republican White House and that Republicans now insist absolutely must be passed.

As a fellow(?) adult, I can also believe it.