Seán

Reported.

I went out tonight. I wore a stitch.

Donut+Milk=Dinner

Rat eggs!

Titanium Testicles.

I like to unwind after a long day at work by closing the curtains and peeling 30 boiled eggs in the darkness while listening to classical music at a traumatic volume

The dreaded subtweet, home to all of the simmering rage that you can eat.

Instead, he will stand before a poster that shows him previously standing in front of a poster, and run for prime minister. His plan will be to keep England white again (+1 orange), taking something or other back from someone or other, and bringing back both fracking and coal mines in Wetherspoons.

Hello. I see you on my feed :)

I worked at a games shop. I was constantly surrounded by people whose primary skill and interest was games. I was rubbish at games, and often felt like an idiot. I only understand games that rely on bluffing, gambling, and applying sudden pressure. No real strategy. Perhaps this is how I have lived.

I think I remember Miss Knobs.

If I am not holding up a 'free hugs' sign, then I am not available for hugs. It's that simple.

If I want to be hugged, it will be quite clear, and there will be no imperative for anyone to oblige.

I say no to unwanted hugs. I often hold my hand out in resistance and say 'no'. After that, I see no reason to be unkind, and things usually proceed without incident.

Do you find that people can be invasive, predatory, and territorial when they inflict unsolicited hugs upon you?

I was once asked "Why do you have to be so Machiavellian? Why can't you just be nice and hug people?"
It was a good question. I didn't reply. Here's the answer. I am good at being Machiavellian, and I enjoy it. I am very kind, but I don't like the pervy intrusive way that people give hugs sometimes.

I have spent much of the holiday trying to fix stuff between people, while trying to appear not to have had a hand in any of it. I did pretty well. Love, persistence, and a few lies. The lies are mine to own, but in their fleeting moment of impact, they facilitate solutions for others, while I lose.

'... I lost a tooth fragment. I found something extremely similar...'.

Check the forensic coolness - made using Snapseed and Inshot.

I lost myself tooth fragment. I found some extremely similar, but it had dried out and looked different. The case is now solved :)

I need a word with the Tooth Fairy.

"Which was nice..."

I literally spent the new years moment pulling out a large remaining fragment of my recently extracted molar tooth, with my fingers.

Thank you.

Legendary.

I'm already feeling unconvinced by this year.

My father is such a cunt.

My father is such a cunt.

I once spent nye with a cat. It was the best.

I wish I had a cat with me now.

Maybe when I reach the point when I am sure that I am statistically likely to die before the cat, I will reconsider.