Grobian Syboe

All of your posts are read aloud to me by a text to speech synthesiser that sounds like a distorted vocoder.

I can't understand them, but if the sounds please me I clap my hands, which instructs the computer to like the post.

Just looked it up and this is exactly up my street

When you hear Mendelssohn's "Funeral March", you immediately think "oh my god, someone has died".

This is actually intentional

I didn't know cricket had anything like this, that's mental

An electric ceiling!? Bloody hell you don't get that in Dunfermline

Cheers Josh! I'm buzzing for the samurai exhibit at the British Museum

I'm going to try and shake the hand of everyone I meet

Happy trespassing! Been an age since I've been up in the hills

Absolutely lovely, where did you head? I've been up in the peaks before for climbing and it's beautiful country

but i don’t CARE if it’s raining, i want to go up to the hills and walk on the slippery rocks!!

I would like to do the latter, but even walking through Edinburgh has me scowling. I will try my best to remain calm

I'm really not much of a traveller! Seems wild to me when there's still so much of Scotland to visit

Always happy to show mutuals around Edinburgh if they happen to be there

Listen, if it's South of the Tweed it's basically in another Hemisphere to me

Heading to London this weekend, which will be the furthest South I have ever been in the UK.

If I see the Parakeets in the parks, I will be content.

Effortlessly defeating another rhetorician with my signature technique "The Philosopher's Penetrating Gaze"

Red wine's got me thinking "c'est la vie"

finally, a solution for "walking and climbing for hours with heavy tackle"

NO chance

A ripple in the ocean of calm, what is its source? Yes, I am kicking it back and hanging loose in the abode of peace with a cool beverage

Don't worry pal it was something that was said on a video I was watching by a cool-cat from the 60s, but we will definitely need to hang out soon!

The boowongs are laden with a mysterious meaning that is beyond my ken, but maybe it's because I haven't put any birdseed out in a while

It's mine, John Ham is a subsidary of Grobian Syboe International Peace Organisation.

SPEED BONNIE BOAT LIKE A BIRD ON THE WING

John Ham's Sack of Sundries - A Cornucopia for a Benighted Age™️

I call the crow Boowong

There is a local crow that has a special call, which it likes to do on a nearby roof between any time between the hours of 10:00 - 12:00, which sounds like "Boowong" repeated 4-5 times.

Thank you.

We are not grooving on the same vibes anymore 😔

it's over for the Williamites

The United Kingdom is in the grip of a decades, perhaps even centuries long Fake & Gay Crisis. I have a plan to make it Real & Gay and it begins with Stuart Restoration and the abolishment of Parliament.

eating some loud crisps x