Beverly Nogdrinker

Ahhhhhh the good old days when the Winter Classic was something to get excited about

So @bvrlytweetmaker.bsky.social is packing for his trail marathon in Kentucky tomorrow and just opened a flask and went "I wonder if this is bourbon or Malort" then took a swig and went "definitely Malort"

And yes obviously I made a "the two genders" joke

Keep your eyes open for theta

Four out of five chatbots say yes. (The fifth said "Elon Musk is a brilliant man with lots of well thought out, practical ideas. He's ensuring the financial security of this company for years to come. Oh, yes, and his personal hygiene is above reproach.")

Let's gooooooooooo

"this Krampus goes to 11"

bubs, i’ve only got two, maybe three Motown puns left in me. Four tops.

you know how i know im a 44yo dad? how much i laughed at this shit

Screenshot of a red tshirt with a white Detroit People Mover logo on it, on a product page.

Detroit people! Transit and train people!

For some reason they have free (u pay $8 shipping) Detroit People Mover shirts right now, til Dec 8.

www.moq1.com/detroit-tran...

Hahaha I guess he doesn't add "DC" to his title to throw people like me off his tracks

I was gonna guess "Doctor" Josh Redd was a chiro but I looked him up and he's a neuropathic MD so still not as legit as Hollywood Upstairs Medical College

We have like 15 different ⅓ c. measuring cups and usually that's all I can find so I'm thinking of making a cookbook that only requires ingredients in multiples of ⅓ cup

I paid $400 for a watch that likes to tell me I'm unproductive and that's enough humiliation for me

Gotcha. With one exception we've always stuck with our dogs' shelter names too. Just curious because Enzo the baker is my sister's favorite Godfather character so I always think of him when I come across that name.

Somebody's gonna take those findom dollars... might as well be you!

Not sure if you've shared this before but did you pick Enzo's name? And if so, what was the reasoning behind it?

I can’t wait til the jagoffs attacking trans folks for just living their lives are ostracized from society. Eat shit, assholes.

Holy shit this is hilarious

I have a glittery bottle of Malört

Didn't know about that so maybe?

I'm having trouble logging onto PACER and when I request a password reset the email isn't coming through to me (it's also not showing up in my spam filter). Next step is to call the help desk so I did . . . and it's currently a 404 minute wait. Everything about the U.S. government is 🤡👞 these days

The 2026 group of death:
Australia
Uruguay
Burkina Faso
Disputed Zone

Is the group of death even a thing now that there are 128 countries in the World Cup?

Ca-ROCK-o

I should've specified less funny than Gretzky was as the host. Agreed that the writers did a great job of riffing off of the fact that he isn't funny

This is somehow less funny than the time Gretzky hosted SNL

🐻⬇️

Is Draft Kings taking bets on when the draw actually starts?

I've only watched AEW once but based on everything I know about it I think that they really need to create their own Peace Prize asap

Lauryn Hill is on time for a show?! #WorldCupDraw

He's norm-core Chris Tucker