V 🌻

I have to see Doechii live bruh

I really have to talk things through. To myself, my friends, my boyfriend, whoever offers me a safe space to yap. It helps me process things so much easier.

The more I learn about this and adhd overall the more grace I give myself instead of beating myself up.

This saturn return is about to be something else

People are so used to me being quiet and letting things slide. Just speaking up for myself this year alone has really showed me that.

All I know is in 2025 my peace will be heavily protected.

Completed 2 films.
Received a grant for my documentary.
Wrote another short film and got the cast together.
Got back into therapy.
Took more time to myself.

I wasn't expecting the growth

Yes, I want to eventually get to the quality of production I see for my art, but this really taught me to put in the work and everything else will follow.

For so long I thought I needed funds for all these resources to get back into filmmaking but really I had everything needed. I was the one really holding myself back, not money.

This year I made 2 films and worked on some marketing work and was able to piece together a solid portfolio. This year I received the grant.

I've been applying for this grant for 3 years. Every year I applied to get funding for films. The only thing is the first 2 years I had nothing to show in regards to filmmaking.

I’m in a weird place of knowing it’s going to be a shit show, but oddly motivated to be the master of my fate, captain of my soul type shit

And this isn't me promoting codependency. Trust me I'm doing the work, I have been for years. But it does feel good not to be doing it alone in this season.

The main thing is that I believe that he genuinely understands and sees me and I don't feel judged or like a bother. It's also the patience he has. This is new for me.

Full transparency, I've had a shitty weekend. I usually go through my lows by myself because I don't want to bother people with my problems or sometimes don't even fully understand the emotions I'm experiencing myself.

Having a partner who makes me feel seen has honestly been the best.

Me watching a film.

1. Start watching.

2. Wonder what I’ve seen one of the actors in before.

3. Google actor.

4. Go to IMDb/their Wikipedia page.

5. Find out every single detail of their entire life.

6. Realise I’ve completely missed the plot of the film and now have no idea what’s going on.

I can't wait.

To avoid disappointment, take people exactly as they are, instead of idealizing about what you wish they would be.

I wasn't expecting it to be that good and now it's on my list of favorites

Star
Rapsh!t
The Wonder Years

I know Clubhouse is long gone, but I'm grateful for the connections that I made and have maintained from that app

I salute you! Having the right support helped me a lot

The stories I have to tell 🙃

Sometime next year I want to start my web series about a woman navigating grad school with undiagnosed ADHD.

They need to just go ahead and release part 2 of Wicked tomorrow

Definitely Cut You Off (To Grow Closer)

Last year I said I'm getting back into filmmaking and I was able to finish 2 shorts when I only planned for one 🎬