@kimmymonte.bsky.social
my stuff: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:5rnmu5xtzqwc2c4u22abl2ka/feed/aaabw5bxhz3yw
kiss me you fool
06.12.2025 00:07 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0*getting hit on by someone else’s boyfriend* aww he must smell my boyfriend
05.12.2025 02:22 — 👍 76 🔁 13 💬 2 📌 1
when someone asks if i’ve seen the movie and i tell them no i’ve read the book
04.12.2025 15:54 — 👍 64 🔁 14 💬 1 📌 0
they prefer the term christmas carolers
04.12.2025 02:57 — 👍 70 🔁 6 💬 2 📌 0you guys ever wonder if aliens watch ET around Christmas time bc it’s their “Home Alone”
04.12.2025 01:18 — 👍 36 🔁 4 💬 0 📌 0if your apparel isn’t gay you can get the fuck outta my life
03.12.2025 13:09 — 👍 54 🔁 8 💬 1 📌 0eve 6 should write a christmas song about putting a tender & mild infant in a blender maybe idk
03.12.2025 01:33 — 👍 38 🔁 4 💬 3 📌 1eve 6 should write a christmas song about putting a tender & mild infant in a blender maybe idk
03.12.2025 01:33 — 👍 38 🔁 4 💬 3 📌 1March Around Getting Apples
02.12.2025 22:00 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0were you wearing your MAGA hat again? you gotta stop doing that
02.12.2025 21:14 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0it was definitely him
02.12.2025 21:06 — 👍 4 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0{extremely guns n’ roses voice}
🎶welcome to the jingle
we got one horse sleighs🎶
they say a dog's mouth is cleaner than a human's mouth but i'm still not putting my dick in one
29.11.2025 17:44 — 👍 160 🔁 10 💬 14 📌 0BATMAN: you either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain
DRIVE-THRU WINDOW: sir, do you want fries or not
If I'm being honest I stopped circling back like 5 years ago
25.11.2025 23:35 — 👍 368 🔁 99 💬 13 📌 3
ma’am
30.11.2025 22:21 — 👍 21 🔁 0 💬 3 📌 0it’s the most wonderful time of the year
30.11.2025 20:31 — 👍 26 🔁 2 💬 0 📌 0
in his defense the baby wouldn’t stop crying
29.11.2025 21:06 — 👍 89 🔁 11 💬 5 📌 1he died doing what he loved: kicking buckets
28.11.2025 16:47 — 👍 54 🔁 10 💬 1 📌 1oh fuck you, stranger things.
28.11.2025 02:57 — 👍 12 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0fucken maga swiper
27.11.2025 15:37 — 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0it was swiper
27.11.2025 15:26 — 👍 5 🔁 0 💬 2 📌 0more on this story as it developes
27.11.2025 15:14 — 👍 14 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0sad news from the thanksgiving day parade: ICE just detained the dora the explorer float.
27.11.2025 15:11 — 👍 141 🔁 26 💬 6 📌 0great day for people who love beige foods
27.11.2025 14:31 — 👍 82 🔁 12 💬 0 📌 0ok i’ll bite. just how strange are these things?
27.11.2025 01:22 — 👍 46 🔁 3 💬 3 📌 1idk please find out
26.11.2025 20:19 — 👍 18 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0i’m sorry what the fuck are you tryna sell me?
26.11.2025 19:29 — 👍 2204 🔁 625 💬 171 📌 361DOORDASH: imagine a $12 sandwich
ME: oh dang that sounds so good
DOORDASH: now imagine that it could be yours for just $37
who the fuck would want a work husband? like i need another asshole in my life asking me where we keep the scissors
25.11.2025 19:54 — 👍 1137 🔁 97 💬 17 📌 6
