Jon Hernandez

Sometimes I’ll be scrolling through the IG or (gulp) Facebook stories of someone having a tragic, public mental breakdown, and then there’ll be a slide of them eating an expensive steak or something like that. Don’t love that. Guy losing his grip on reality is still more successful than me? Great!

Merry Tyler Kolek to all.

My favorite part of Pluribus is when the whole planet packs up and leaves that chud lady in Albuquerque. It’s so satisfying. Think of all the times some unbearable punisher has made you go, “I gotta get the fuck out of here,” and extrapolate it over a major American city. It’s a power fantasy.

First gig with new band tonight. Allowing myself to believe I simply know how to play all of these songs, and there’s no need to drive home and start practicing the weird riff that happens once in song 3.

Just thinking about when @oldjonhernandez.bsky.social got a Google smart speaker thing and that stupid thing was just not gonna play lemuria no matter how nicely or firmly he asked

Some kind words about the Pressure Wheel (@pressurewheel.bsky.social) EP over at @rosyoverdrive.com.

Has anyone said “more like THROATUS” yet?

I support anyone practicing whatever faith they practice so long as it doesn’t infringe on others. Honest! But calling this recent uptick in Very Loud Christianity™️ a response to years of persecution is like if I said I’m being persecuted because nobody will talk to me about the Offspring anymore.

I make and work on lots of stuff that I’m really proud of and find very fulfilling. Having to do actual work at my job is a major impedance to doing stuff I care about. We gotta do something about this.

I hate falling behind on work deadlines because then I have to spend a day or two focused on my job. This presents a problem in my carefully curated life where I pretty much pretend I don’t have a job at all.

I don’t want to support or share any AI slop, but the closest I’ve come is a clip I just saw of Barney Fife uncovering the Epstein Files on the Andy Griffith show.

Did Okada just spark a career resurgence by adding the ripcord bing bong to his arsenal??????

Bear with me, more new music:

New band, @pressurewheel.bsky.social (pressurewheelmusic on IG).

Our first EP, Atomic Woe, is available everywhere today.

If bandcamp’s more your speed: pressurewheel.bandcamp.com/album/atomic...

FFO: uh…let’s say Constantines, Hot Snakes, Jets to Brazil

another big win for the PNW

Did you know that So Much For The Afterglow is so densely packed with undeniable hooks that the federal government ordered them to add that stupid instrumental track so that listeners would have a chance to fucking breathe?

It’s nice to send an IG message to someone you don’t speak to often about their video of AFI playing an old deep cut, then scroll up and see that your last message exchange two years prior was also about AFI.

ah shit that’s so nice Andy, thanks!!!!

Two new Timeshares songs up today. Our first new tunes in a while. They let me do the fast palm muting on one of these. How fast? You gotta go listen to find out.

distrokid.com/hyperfollow/...

I have a cousin who just posted “If genocide ends the moment the hostages are released, it wasn’t genocide, it was propaganda.”

I like that. I’m gonna use it.

“If I stop eating your steak frites the moment my Santa Fe Southwest-style cobb salad arrives, I didn’t actually eat all them frites.”

Look folks, this adderall isn’t going to work all day. You sure you want to soak up two hours on me silently nodding in a Zoom window?

I posted this on Facebook fourteen years ago, apparently.

fwiw, growing up with emotionally inept ballbusters is a great character-builder. There’s just a rough transitional patch in your mid-20’s where you think anyone being kind to you is somehow trying to start a fight.

I grew up with emotionally inept ballbusters, and most of them weren’t even funny, so it was just “friends” being unreasonably cruel to one another.

So now that I mostly interact with normal people, when I encounter a northeast ballbuster, I just wanna put a hand on their shoulder & ask, “Must we?”

I’ve been keeping pretty quiet about a bunch of music things I’m working on that I’m excited about (until this tweet, I guess), and I gotta tell you, I have not shaken the impulse to shit every thought or feeling about them onto the internet.

Anytime I eat literally anything, a middle aged woman shows up on my phone and tells me that it’s decimating my gut microbiome. Gut flora hates to see me coming.

The Outrunners’ Newports tights have rejuvenated my love for professional wrestling.

Fantastic Four! Good! Very good!! They should have made this movie for me when I was 15, when it would be less embarrassing to tell people exactly how much I loved it. I just tried to tell my wife, and I’m pretty sure I can hear her tearfully packing a suitcase.

Lord knows I don’t wanna be out here tweeting about a The Bear needle drop in 2025

but when “Something So Right” by Paul Simon started playing after that monologue, I started making noises like when you knock someone out in Street Fighter 2. I’m still breathing heavy.

I didn’t, but my dad was bringing home X-Men stuff in that period and the years that followed. I remember thinking the outer expanses of the X-line were strange and for older kids, haha.

I think it’s a huge breath of fresh air from everything else that spins out of the immediate post-Claremont era.

I just saw you were doing this and started clicking through all the 90’s stuff to get to you talking about PAD’s first X-Factor run (probably a top two or three run for me) and well, damn, haha.

These are fun reads! You’re getting to an era I just recently started filling my gaps in.