Chris Burton

Hey quick question. Why does ICE even have guns anyway?

Sometimes I feel like they made me anxious about quicksand and acid rain as a child for no reason.

Is it Pi Day?

I am Movie Watcher - I'd say most movies I've watched I've wound up watching far more than 6 times.

Lizardfolk. Dragonborn didn't exist for my formative years in D&D.

I Can't Believe It's Not Wyrms

The Aqua-family is seriously underrated

My boi Scout who had a fever this morning and is now sleeping off what is hopefully a minor cold

You've found it. The perfect comeback to that ridiculous argument.

They’re not going to get out of this by playing semantics.

Sending detailed information about an upcoming military strike on unclassified channels (and even to the wrong guy) is wrong, reckless, and obviously a threat to American troops.

We have an air fryer that's more like a toaster oven than a traditional basket air fryer. I love it so much.

Honorable mention to the ice maker in the fridge.

National Security Group Chat is like a band name Andy Dwyer would think up

Yo that sounds AMAZING

Hi, we are an alternative to Amazon-owned Audible 👋🏻 With us, you select the independent bookshop you want to support (we have 3,000+ partners across the globe), and we share profits from your purchase with them.

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But where has all the non-slasher horror gone? Where all the non-basketball sports movies???

I will also accept "a ___ girlie," like "a theater girlie" or "a dinosaur girlie"

I tried to make an appointment with my PCP to check on my diabetes and get meds refilled. This is a doctor I have seen for 3 years now, in an office I've worked with for 6 years. The next available appointment is in SEPTEMBER.

"We can't have socialized healthcare. The wait times are too extreme." 🫠

I have to admit metric makes a lot more sense, but the date should definitely be Day/Month/Year - smallest increment to largest! Get it together, *checks notes,* "rest of the world!"

I just found out that the Animorphs audiobooks are available on Spotify so that will be my entire personality for the next couple of weeks.

Do you ever think of yourself as actually being dead, lying in a box with a lid on it?

You might do much. What is your parentage?

I have a bunch of weekend events this month so I've been taking Wednesdays off to balance the hours. It's been great!

SOOOO looking forward to this!

Absolutely this. I wanted to throw in the towel with the community theater I've been working with because "there are bigger things to worry about." Are there bigger things than art? As a theater nerd, I contend:

No. There are not.

I never considered frozen donuts! Frozen pop tarts are fantastic. Donuts were right there!!!

a black and tan dachshund puppy stands in front of a blanket pile and looks at the camera. his long ears hang down lower than his chin, and they’re fanned backwards slightly so you can see their tan interiors and little black tips. his right ear covers up most of his long sausage body so you can just make out his black rump and little tan back paw. his tan eyebrow dots are raised slightly and he’s looking at you with a stoic, closed-mouth defiant expression.

This is Ralph. His body composition is approximately 40% ear. But that does not mean he wants to listen to your podcast. 12/10 (IG: ralph_kd0821)

Do you want Rocco's Basilisk? Because this is how you get Rocco's Basilisk.

Reverend Horton Heat

What if you put Flamin' Hot Cheeto dust in deviled eggs instead of paprika