Michael

My friend just said this rhyme. I’ve never heard this version of it so I HAD to share! 🤭🤭

There once was a man from Nantucket
Who had a dick so long he could suck it
He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin
If my ear were a cunt I would fuck it

The type of 🍰🍰 in question…

My first meal I cooked in the new house. Sorry one piece of the tenderloin was missing. I couldn’t wait…🤭🤭🤤🤤

🍆🍆🤭🤭

I could watch this on repeat…🤭🤭🥵🥵

How I arrived on Bluesky

This chibi looks like he’s saying whatever…🤭🤭

I miss overtime. I was salaried for a lot of my career and it was 5-12’s(and then they got in real big trouble) and scaled our hours back. I stepped down for a bit and got a ton of OT because I was the only one to volunteer. When I was salaried, the longest I worked was like 20 hours in one day.

I think the settings adjust it when we update. Mine does it too.

This is me to a T. Like me, it’s kind of a love language to make occasions like that, special.

#goals

a woman in a red uniform is talking on a cell phone in a restaurant kitchen . ALT: a woman in a red uniform is talking on a cell phone in a restaurant kitchen .

Why are you so far south of me?

a woman is crying while sitting in a chair in front of a fireplace . ALT: a woman is crying while sitting in a chair in front of a fireplace .

Sadly…no

So I’m eating licorice and my chihuahua is throwing a fit and doing the most because he wants some…🤣🤣

Nooooo

More wars in history were based on the “divine right” of religion. Unfortunately it’s these types of people that ruin religion for the rest of us. My aunt and her family were all about “the second coming of Christ.” Everything them and the Pentecostals talk about is preparing for then. It’s SICK…

a cartoon drawing of a nose with a pink lip ALT: a cartoon drawing of a nose with a pink lip

Burning calories one way or another…

Damn duck…🤭🤭

I second this sentiment! 😏😏🤭🤭

They’re doing the lord’s work…🤭🤭

👀👀

I can feel this picture.

a cartoon of batman wearing a blue cape and mask with his hand on his chin . ALT: a cartoon of batman wearing a blue cape and mask with his hand on his chin .

Interesting design choice…