MsTacoBelle

Anyone know where I can get a pair of soft sole clogs?

Work is giving me a bunch of shit about the noise.

Sorry I slapped your face, but you poked your head over the pillow wall.

Hahaha. No it’s fine. I was planning on joining the void anyway, thanks for leaving me shouting into it.

(after sex)

Would you mind completing this brief survey?

them: have you seen any drones?

me: i haven’t had the chance to look up tbh

Most popular Christmas gifts of 2024:

Faux wood decorative box made of real wood
Hasbro Connect 2
Burberry diva cup set
Your mom
Santa dreidel

I’m I have to put my “good” sneakers on to bake cookies or my back hurts years old

Posted this at the old place, but thought folks on @bsky.app might like to know I finally met my "mother".

Always on the lookout for someone else to disappoint

The worst part of being in love is having to shave your legs in the winter. You lose a layer of warmth.

you’re a fun party girl and suddenly you wake up being 50, wearing flannel pj pants, crafting orange slice garlands while snuggling your cat

The only attention I want is from dogs.

Just found out my wife is pregnant.

Considering we haven’t had sex in two years, we’ve decided to name him Jesus

I won’t be happy until men have no pockets at all

Not all heroes wear capes.

Some are draped with meatballs and provolone.

Have you eaten a vegetable lately?

That dark pit of nothing in your stomach that is Monday

I've been doing these kegels for years, and yet to notice a change in my pelvic floor.

My wife just replaced every hanger in the house with felt hangers...and I didn’t say shit.

I saw “Mommie Dearest”.

An Everlasting Gobstopper but it’s crab rangoon

Dad are we half way there yet?

~ Jon Bon Jovi’s kid probably

*dips toes in. I think I forgot how to do this.