rex

hm? oh you said you didn’t ask? sorry i can’t hear you i’m busy listening to mitski’s eighth studio album Nothing’s About To Happen To Me for the sixty-fifth time this week

i click post. i go outside and see a bird and a tree. i spend 0-1 weeks rejoicing being the world’s genius before i catch myself starting a sentence with “wouldn’t it be funny if”

i spend 1-2 weeks editing from dawn til dawn while listening to the same album on repeat, irreparably fucking up my streaming stats for the year. i cut a bunch of bullshit and add back more than i cut. i vacillate between joy and despair but do manage to be consistently unpleasant to be around

i plug the last of the holes between the disjointed sections i’ve strewn through my wip doc(s) over the past months. i rejoice being the world’s genius. i read the whole thing through for the first time and remember i am actually the world’s idiot. i despair. i figure out what the story is about.

i relaunch being almost done. i get really scared. i write one hundred words in three weeks and frown at my document for five. i beg around for help or an ego stroke and/or to be taken to the vet and put down. i get really great advice from really great people. i figure out what the story is about.

i push sections of outline and story around like rearranging furniture. i add 3k words i don’t need but that do make me feel better. i actually bother to read my outline through again and remember i’m the world’s genius. i write 3k phenomenal words in a day and 2-10k awful words over the next week.

i refine my outline. i write 1k great words in a weekend. i write 2-10k acceptable words over the next month. i figure out what the story is about. i announce to everyone i know that i’m almost done. i write 2-10k mid words over the next 1-8 months. i get really scared. i complain. i despair.

i make a new outline. i write 6k more words. i despair. i refine my outline. i write some css for some reason. i get sick to bastard death of thinking about this wip and resolve to finish it NOW. i write 6-15k pretty alright words in a week. i write 2-4k words over the next 2-10 months. i despair.

my writing process? well it goes like this. i start a sentence with “wouldn’t it be funny if.” i fuck around for two hours and spit out eight hundred pretty good words. i make an outline and estimate a <10k finished piece. i write 15k mid words over the next 2-10 months. i despair. i despair.

YouTube video by MitskiVEVO Mitski - I'll Change for You

high on my list of “songs i aspire never to be wine drunk to” youtu.be/BPy1NIiKKW0

her career trajectory shifting out from haunting utility sink club bathroom sadchic into emo ballads that would be at home in the kinds of western movies where nothing happens but still leave you feeling gutted and heartbroken as the credits roll has been really great for me specifically

in twentyfour hour a day mitski lockdown… she dont even cut me a break in dreams

sixteen or seventeen boxes or none please

ok. ok. big giant sleep and back on the horse tomorrow. watch this space for the party i will inevitably throw in twelveish hours

at any stage in the art creation process i’m either the world’s genius or the king of jesters or the champion of idiots. at all stages i’m obnoxious

my propensity for throwing a fit is a very annoying and stereotypical art-guy trait that i absolutely have. yes all of my ego and emotion are wrapped up in this piece. no i will not untangle them.

i’m gonna stomp my feet and slump around on surfaces and moan and groan and throw a fit a bit. then after i have a fat angry sleep i’ll wake up tomorrow and pound out six paragraphs and i’ll be the hottest most brilliant genius on the planet again. #vow

i still got a fucking daunting amount of editing to do and i knowwww its gonna hit super big time when its all done done done but i was looking forward to having this thing in an editable state today 😤

SOON… 🔜

screenshot of me typing a bazillion cussing emojis and bluesky showing a popup asking “Are you writing in Korean?”

brb learning korean, a language that understands me

im like five paragraphs from freedom!!!!!!!!!!! this thing has been in the works for A YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

didnt finish my chapter today!!!!!!! 🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬

we need a new post

i gotta see hubert

harsh words considering i’ve invented a world where they made nu carvival 2 2 just for you :0/ i can’t help if you loathe my beautiful bespoke reality

i don’t know how to lie i only say things that are beautiful and true…….

i did dude you deleted it for nu carnival 2 2

they’ve moved on you’re too late

whwre are the fujoshi powerusers

thirty years into being from maryland i’m finally indulging my instinctive drive to put old bay on everything and bröther it’s paying off in spades