LSPogo

Rent boys are two blocks down that way.

Thats some solid cynical humour!

🎯🎯

I did a lot of hunkerbunkery yesterday. Hunkered down in my bunk and sleeped most of the day.

It was very nice sleep because totely illeagle.

I was told I should refrain from removing heads of state because I don't know who or what will replace them and I also can't control it. Sounds like a dumb rule but okay whatevs.

If the United States is going to go around the world causing regime changes, we should practice here first.

We did.

Iranian state media confirms supreme leader is dead.

But the worst part of JFK's wasn't Bay of Pigs, it was the abrupt ending.
HEY!

Excuse me, but I listen to The President.

He said many times, it was obwLIDoowaydit.

You should pay better attention.

I'm sure John McCain is cheering from whichever afterlife he earned.

Unless evidence shows otherwise, I'm blaming all terrible trends in pro sports on their embrace of gambling.

I don't see why. She doesn't respect me now.

Nope. That's pretty much it.

Is your puppy into the grave bodily injury experience? Well, I suppose you're about to find out.

That's not just stupidity, she's acting as an accomplice.

a woman in a blue dress is dancing in a field with a caption that says eeeaaaooo . ALT: a woman in a blue dress is dancing in a field with a caption that says eeeaaaooo .

This dance should keep you safe.

Today I reached the weight goal I set when I was in Weight Watchers in 1999. Back then I got within 1 pound before gaining all I lost plus a few more.

Whee!

If you are autistic and have no friends, check out punk rock, where being weird is good and being totally accepted by normals is highly suspect. I've heard autists are also considered normal among train hobbyists and various collectors.

a cartoon dog wearing a cape with the letter u on it flies through the air ALT: a cartoon dog wearing a cape with the letter u on it flies through the air

Super-Autist

I believe after they weren't needed to pull carriages, horses became more glue.

Hey maybe they should change it so if you buy four beers at the bar, you have to show birth certificates and passports for four people. That would certainly make America great, right?

He's married to a U.S. citizen.

YES. As far as I know, the equal time rule only exists at CBS. They invoked it to prevent the Late Show with Stephen Colbert from having James Talarico as a guest. It's the only time I've heard it used in the 21st century.

Trump demands that Ukraine surrender utterly to Putin in time for Trump to celebrate peace on July 4.

Every time he says "peace in Ukraine" or "end the war" or "peace plan" he means "Ukraine must surrender to Putin". For Independence Day. Trump is a monster.

The inuring of America

The police set up a Demi-Tasse Force to investigate the incident.

FBI
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Fan
Boys
International

Now you're just copying the chyron on Morning Joe.

I enjoyed decrypting these jokes on IMDb.