Jared Gray

Casey.

Quote from Scream 2: “That is so Moral Majority. You can't blame real life violence on entertainment.”

Sorry, the Stab movies are just too popular!

Eponine from Les Misérables

And I know
It’s only in my mind
That I’m talking to myself and not to him
And although
I know that he is gay
I mean, he’s gay, excuse me, he’s BLIND!

“We’re talking about China now. Or— Miami. We’re talking about Miami now.”

godDAMMIT

My grocery store finally stopped doing “Happy Hanukkah here’s some cookies decorated like snowflakes but they’re blue so it counts” but they still keep their “Not Kosher For Passover” matzahs readily available at Passover 🙃

This type of thing happens so goddamn frequently, but it’s always worse when it comes from a politician.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, at this point I’d trust Jack Skellington to do a better job with Jewish holidays than anyone else.

Andy Kim’s ridiculous Purim post, using Mardi Gras clip art

Quick, how do you say Laissez les bon temps rouler in Hebrew? 🙃

Lyrics from “I Know It’s Today” from Shrek The Musical

Checking the news every morning like

Pfft. He didn’t even eat the PEACH!

Gotta clean it up for the algorithm:
“He was robbing me! Grape-ing me!”

So much happened before Sidney dropped in

the sky is SUCH a hazy shade of winter right now

Tshirt of Olaf from Frozen folded to read “I like war”

Some of these crashouts would be much more concise if they’d just say the thing they’re trying to hide

Anyway since insider trading is apparently totally fine now, anyone want to sell me some shares for like a dollar and then make something happen so I can sell them tomorrow for a couple hundred thousand? Thanks!

He was so real for this.

Real ones know

Maybe you could get off WITH the sofa like the vice prez does

Be gay! Do crime!

A blessing for modern times:

“May good fortune follow you with the intensity and persistence of a Shen Yun advertising campaign.”

Friend on discord showed me this and I thought a few people who enjoyed this person's comics might like to know how they post over on the Hitler site.

Selfie of me in the locker room post workout, exhausted, achy, and clothed (sorry to the thirsty goons!)

Finally got myself back to the gym after weeks of literally zero gym. Whew!

It’s the new “Tiny House” trend!

“It seems a lot of us are taking things that don’t belong to us, now aren’t we?”

“Look, it’s Glinda!”

Glinda and Elphaba’s hands reaching for each other, from the Wicked movie poster

I think I’m finished, just gotta double check to make sure! But right now, the final clock-ticks are as follows:

PART ONE: 1:59:10
INTERMISSION: 00:15:11
FOR GOOD: 01:43:52
CREDITS: 00:09:27

Though Cameron Mackintosh, the producer of Miss Saigon, had employed a "student rush," the tickets were in the rear balcony and only reserved for high school and college kids. "What about all the poor people who aren't students?" I say. "Let's flip it" says Kevin. "What do you mean?" "We'll put them in the first two rows." "That's it!" I say. "We'll sell the first two rows for twenty dollars-but to everybody." "It'll be like a wave" says Kevin. "The people in the first two rows will start a wave that spreads to the back of the theater." "And we'll sell them on the day of the show, which will guarantee there's a line in front of the theater every day." We have a plan. From Memoirs Of A Theater Kid

Speaking it into existence: I want to be Jeffrey Seller when I grow up, not because of his accomplishments and impact, but because he knew how IMPORTANT it was to include this specific bit in his memoirs

As one of the many teenage Rent-Heads who benefited tremendously from this decision, thank you!

How big are you?

It’s snowing! And it’s pretty! And it’s nice to see that the world is full of wonderful things.