I feel so sad thinking about trump’s failing health because if he dies

He’d be the second Venezuelan president that they’d lose in under a year 💔

For everyone with anxiety out there
You may think you’re awkward
But you’re not kill the pope on vibes alone awkward
Keep shining ✨

The pope immediately after JD Vance left

Bills gone soft
He used to be way more openly islamophobic

How do you organize a library of sausages?
With the andouille decimal system

Why hagrid got the Cracker Barrel ceiling??

I missed my alarm this morning, woke up late, and I’m pretty annoyed at myself
But hey
I’m not Drake 👍🏻

People don’t know that Kesha is a lot like Zorro
She’s more than a person. She’s a symbol. And the mantle will live long through generations. Anyone can wield the hat

Dude, I Love It - A Stand-Up Comedy Show — Brooklyn Comedy Collective (BCC) Two friends, two different styles of comedy, and a guarantee that there will be something for everyone at this show. Tickets: $10 in Advance / $15 Day of Show

Crazy story. I can predict the future but in options. Either the person reading this continues life as a doodoo head or they grab a ticket for mine and @johnfranklinn.bsky.social ‘s standup show in Brooklyn, TOMORROW 1/24 at 7! Wish I could tell the future better

www.brooklyncc.com/show-schedul...

Elon doing that salute on Martin Luther king day is the most white-South African thing I’ve ever seen

When the train decides to stop between stations I think they should really consider the fact they’re keeping me from being able to pee

Hey Blue Sky, we got a banger for you NYE - Pennsylvanians come on out!!