Ryan Lindley 🇨🇦

Just finished a jar of pickles and had to laugh at the use of the word “Ultimate” and the actual (minus maybe 10 chunks that got dumped out) amount of garlic in the jar.

There is more garlic in peanut butter than there was in this jar of pickles 🤣😂

Why does this work so well??? 🔥🔥

The host of tonight’s festivities also needs a round of applause. Photo courtesy of The Grooming Lab 😂🐾
Tell him how handsome he is with his turkey tie.
Tell him!

🎶“Life for me is a gravy boat fantasy….”🎵

“I’m sorry, you stupid motherfucker but were you under the dilute impression you could eat Goldfish crackers without my express knowledge and consent of action? No, I didn’t think so…..”

I live with a mobster

The struggle is real

When you have a wing craving, sometimes you gotta steal the dust and sauce recipe of your favourite closed-down pub from their former employees and do it at home! 😂🔥

The Niebolt Street house from Stephen King’s “It” was a derelict, dilapidated and abandoned property that housed a portal to pure evil.

In Hamilton, this is a charming, characteristic 2-storey with a loft on a spacious corner lot in a quiet neighbourhood and was just reduced to $899,000.00 😂

a man in a red shirt is sitting in a car with a seat belt on . ALT: a man in a red shirt is sitting in a car with a seat belt on .

Gonna get a head start for 2025 here:

How many years have you been gaslit about the “ThE wAr On ChRiStMaS”?

How many of your Christmas celebrations have been absolutely devastated by this decades-long “wAr”?

Do you fucking get it yet? You are just having “shower fights” in public 😂

Yes please!

a man in a suit and tie is standing in front of a painting with the words thanks for coming to my ted talk below him ALT: a man in a suit and tie is standing in front of a painting with the words thanks for coming to my ted talk below him

Some real talk: The faster y’all realize that chicken wings, brisket and beef jerky were considered “peasant gruel,” the faster you’ll realize we’ve all been hoodwinked by strategic marketing and uncontrolled, cannibalistic capitalism.

Did I rip too hard on the top to taste them and ruin the social media money shot? Yes. Yes I did 😂

Every Friday morning I check in with @genevalaitis on @610cktb and we chat about cooking and BBQ. Yesterday, (after learning of Gene’s disdain for plain yellow mustard 😂) we talked about dry rubs and beef ribs. So, here we are with a nice rack with a grainy horseradish mustard binder and SPG dry rub

Carney is actually playing the 4D chess the mouth-breathers quote. You’re literally watching Canada cripple them with spreadsheets and math, rather than rhetoric and memes.

“WhY dIdNt He MaKe A dEaL?!”

Sit back and grab the popcorn, kids.

I love this country so much ❤️🇨🇦

(Waiting to see if anyone notices I should have said purposefully over there 🫣😂)

Purposely stating false math equations on Bluesky = Understood by logic

Purposely stating false math equations on Twitter = Predictable

Thanks for being the obvious litmus test

If the math errors in this post confused you?

Good.

You had to figure it out without your fingers because it’s literally incomprehensible to a normal person.

Yet here we are, comprehending it like it’s fucking okay.

Elon Musk Predicted To Be World's First Trillionaire —Some Say He Deserves Every Penny, But Others Say It's 'Inhumane' As Millions Struggle to Eat Headlines in 1999 speculated that Bill Gates might become the world's first trillionaire. But today, with much of his fortune pledged to philanthropy, another name is dominating that conversation — El...

uk.finance.yahoo.com/news/elon-mu...

Oops! It’s actually 2,000,000

Glad you’re here to correct me and realize where the fuck we actually are.

One million dollars is comprehensible to a “normal” brain. It’s like owning two moderate homes.

One Billion Dollars is 1000 time One Million. That 500 moderate homes.

One Trillion dollars is one million times one million dollars. That’s 500,000 moderate homes.

Do you fucking get this yet?

Ashley and I are making sure we keep up with the latest slang. I think we’re pretty hip.

Skipping the US: Mexico and Canada enter into trade bypass agreement It seeks to safeguard the continuity of trade flows between the two nations without US border interference.

www.freightnews.co.za/article/skip...

I’m absolutely gobsmacked she shot herself in the back of the head next week outside of any camera range.

Totally didn’t see that coming.

Daily reminder

The music stripped from the final song.

Ozzy knew. The Prince of Darkness was also the Prince of Light for his wife and family. Rest well, my dude.

Tomato tomato

Resale Front row centre for McCartney in Hamilton?
$7,000.00

Resale nosebleeds?
$350-ish

You want my vote moving forward? You best be including the break up of this stupid fucking entertainment monopoly