Memento (new) Morty 🌙

I heard lub dub

I did this with a stethoscope once

just like me fr

I'm only mad they didn't take me with them

Agreed

@ilhanMN Ilhan Omar: i hope you aren't drunk and took your staff's advice, rashida and i don't know this man and feel confident he didn't care about us. please restrain from drinking too much as you have been warned from your staff and stay off social media when you are drunk. i pray in (t)his moly month you find peace and respect for your self, Rep Omar is quote tweeting nancy mace, who posted a photo of ayatollah khamenei and 'my heart goes out to ilhan omar and rashida tlaib tonight. sending them thoughts and prayers'.

bodied. ethered. sent to outer space.

Nope!

This place is a prison imo

I am always trying to leave so jot that down

extubated to leaving AMA 🫡

Sorry hope you're ok 😬

I think a lot do and that is why they like him!

Can you DM it to me

Besides teaching everyone that there are important vessels in the neck

What the fuck did Charlie Kirk do for education

Putting him up there with Booker T. Washington is some crazy, evil shit

I read that this morning and thought "He is such a little bitch lmao"

Social media created this nonsense idea that not exposing yourself to hatred is isolationist. Choosing to not spend your free time with bigots isn’t living in a bubble. I don’t need to know what’s going on at X. I won’t be smarter or more knowledgeable or empathic by being there. Neither will you.

wish I could help

“direct your anger at trump not the democrats” buddy you are severely underestimating the amount of anger i have available to me

Pete Rose also had inappropriate relationships with minors and I hate that he is a god here in Cincinnati, but yay go sports

heart shakes

Oh my god

stanley tucci with members of the gold medal winning USA women's hockey team

crying in the club* (*at my desk) bc stanley tucci took the USA women's hockey team out for a meal at his favorite restaurant and they gave him his own jersey

The Aquatic Sensory Deprivation Tank Experience has been discontinued since one of our hippos freaked out and saw God.

hit the albuterol too hard

That's so funny because I guess it's the opposite here

Yes I do see that now

I am too hot to be on a “dating app”. My “date” should be buy”ing” me dinner and discount margs at “App”lebees

Someone tag me when they get better