Jess

While trying to substantiate my Dad's juicy gossip claims about a McCains fries brother breaking from the family to start Cavendish fries back in the ol' NB...

I come across even more juicy scandal!!! 🔎 Say it ain't so!

It's been 2 months since my dog almost burned down my house by turning my stove on and melting a reusable shopping bag onto it while I was at school.

It's been one month since she passed from cancer 🌈😢

Anyways I just used my stove for the first time since then, man I need to stop eating out.

What's with the accounts of just pictures of random flowers?

one time I traced my steps back 4-5 stores in a mall for my missing wallet. Anyways it was in my hand.

one time I traced my steps back 4-5 stores in a mall for my missing wallet. Anyways it was in my hand.

Instacart 😅

*young me, developing a strong sense of justice*

This is gonna be great, what an asset, this will never drive me insane

So it goes.

same guy?

I KNEW it!!!!

Mark my words and bookmark this post:

Something is going to happen, and people are not going to like it.

I recalled from memory a direct quote from someone's favourite movie to win an argument against them, and yeah that's a Top 10 moment in my life so far.

Look, how did The Cube exist before time began?

i would love to open a tom cruise-themed whiskey bar and call it “risky business,” with the word “risky” being a nod to “risky business,” one of his hit films

Sorry, I’ll never be ready to rumble. Go ahead and rumble without me

Your dose of cuteness 🥰🥰🥰

Good morning everyone!

Social media is no place for humor or sarcasm.

look you can't tell me that platform crocs aren't cool

When the ear worm stuck in your head a day ago is reactivated because you deigned to scroll down on your own page. 💀👂🪱

Gonna read some sci-fi!

🎶Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, this damn song, brah!
la la is stuck in my head 😫🎵

“Here’s how I stay organized using just three notebooks.”

I don’t take advice from losers who ONLY have three notebooks.

Three notebooks.

Fucking amateur.

My notebooks have more notebooks than that.

In Greece every floor is baklava.

a red fox is running through the snow in the snow . ALT: a red fox is running through the snow in the snow .

If you see this repost with a GIF of your favorite animal!

Actually getting some work done this summer! 😇✌️

meme: two books left book: THE LORD OF THE RINGS TRILOGY right book (much fatter and split into blue and red, red is far longer than blue): THE LORD OF THE RINGS TRILOGY IF MERRY & PIPPIN HAD A GUN red: defeating Sauron blue: taking the gun away from Merry and Pippin

i'm sorry for posting facts:

If your forest isn't enchanted, go fuck yourself

I don’t think it’s fair that if you’re a robot, the CAPTCHA doesn’t give you the option to admit it. Like there is no “YES I am a robot” option. We need to stop forcing robots to lie.