Lumen (babbling)

I feel weirdly disconnected, I had an off week last week and with all the news I feel so drained, it feels like I have no energy for even replying to friends, which makes them mad at me which makes me just shut down more.
I'm so tired of everything right now.

Had a surprisingly productive day while trying to distract myself from how tender and weirdly raw I feel mentally.

I washed my bedsheets but forgot to put on new ones and now I am sad and slightly tipsy and have an unmade bed Q_Q Thanks past me.

Also I got three mails about how my parcel could not be delivered and every time I get another I am just seething, bitch I was home Q_Q

I'm just mad bcs I paid 10 euros so I can go outside myself and get my parcel and then walk back up three flights of stairs bcs the elevator is still broken.

It's like I summoned it (I have not, it has always been that way), just got an email that they could not deliver bcs nobody was home.
I am home bitch, I am bleeding out and have nowhere to go, fuck you.

Not me waiting excitedly for a parcel when I know the carrier will probably not deliver it bcs this one never does, they always bring it to the parcel shop. I still always get my hopes up Q_Q

Living on the edge XD
In reality it's just bcs it's most convenient, if I don't have stuff visible I forget it exists so if I don't see the chapstick I won't use it.

Hahaha, thankfully the glue stick I use is one of those transparent ones so it smells horrible, but I do grab for the wrong one regularly. I also have a tube of normal glue right next to my hand cream XD

not going to drink anything after this XD Thankfully I only grabbed the wrong one but smelled the difference.

Keeping your chapstick next to your gluestick is not the smartes move.

The worst time to run out of toilet paper is on the heaviest day of your period when the elevator in your house is out of order u_u

The world feels rough right now

So please enjoy this shrimp, filmed off Cozumel, Mexico. It may be a larval reef shrimp, but we don’t know what species or how long it lives or what it eats. The world is still full of wonder and beauty and mystery.

🎥 @pedrovalenciam scuba diver on Insta

oh dear lord, deutsche bahn is never gute reise Q_Q

Doodled my food, bcs sometimes I don't know what else to put in my sketchbook.

Haha, come on over, I have leftovers XD

It turned out really nice!

A picture of a square piece of cheesecake topped with blueberry jam.

Witness the fruits of my labor

made cheesecake with blueberry jam but it's cooling in the fridge for at least another hour Q_Q

I really don't envy young people. Growing up with TikTok where everybody tells you what you need to be or need to look for or need to do, I'd never know who I'd want to be.

Toad spurs on Frog, enraptured by the latter's ghost story. From "Shivers" In *Days with Frog and Toad*

“What happened then?” asked Toad.

I wish this site would give me the option to remove followers, I mostly get like, spam followers and it inflates the number which I really dislike. Not that the number means anything, it's just a private account.

I don't know how ppl knit with thin yarn regularly, this scarf is taking forever Q_Q

Buying more notebooks will fix me.
Ignore the stash of notebooks in the back of my closet.

My toxic trait is watching a video about somebody organizing their life with programs and systems and thinking "I can do that."

My adhd brain was also the reason why I had hummus pasta for lunch and dinner.