Will Humphrey

"What do we want?"
"A compilation album!"
"What shall we call it?"
"Now!"

If I want to watch a joyless middle-age man in marketing eat a burger, I'll turn on my front-facing camera

Yes, i'm thrilled. A big fan of being able to easily buy bits on the way home from the station, too!

This was just dreadful. Someone 'celebrating' the death of a genuinely talented person akin to The Office. Strong 'But I'm still alive, so I won' vibes.

The structural surveyor's got a job on their hands, that's for sure.

"I write futurist think pieces. Here's how I think we solve all war and ensure long term gender equality"

Yup. Hang on a sec. aldiconsultation.co.uk/reigate/prop...

They will be replacing The Range, which is totally shite + means I can pick bits up on the way home. ALL FOR IT.

(And yes, they must be).

Advertising / CRM agency - I helped win them £4m worth of new business. Daring to ask for a promotion, and then being told my job was going to be given to someone returning from maternity leave.

Performance was not rewarded. Tactical friendships were. I don't do workplace politics.

Aldi might be coming to where I live. *air punch*

It's why I go into work. Makes me more productive - being surrounded by folk working hard.

Of course, the crassest one i've seen on LI was using someone's death to say how well you're doing (this happened yesterday, yes i've met the bloke before, and yes he's just as awful as you might expect).

I don't know when life became one long admin list, but i'm going to suggest it's 'Second child at school', Jerry.

Ryder, and Rubble, from the 'kids' tv show, Paw Patrol. One clearly gives the dog a bone.

The House of Lords Digital & Communications Committee just published their report on AI, copyright & the creative industries, and their conclusions could not be clearer.

🧵 1/5

Once again asking parents to not turn their kids into content for the business cosplay site. Not everything needs to feed the machine, especially when they don't have a say.

Yes. The right result, and the right final, though. Hope the Kiwis do it.

Oh, NOW TV, you have me confused with someone who likes F1.

You should pay me to watch that.

John Waters' Saving Private Ryan.

JACKS, JACKS, JACKS!

Channelling Will Jacks for another match saving innings.

Love a soylent green diet.

I believe in Will Jacks. I BELIEVE.

We are going to get smashed, let's be honest.

Quentin Tarantino’s Barbie.

A literal representation of Autarky. Making the ersatz was hard, but we cracked it at 3am this morning.

I know it’s a colossal faff for parents, but seeing off two excited children (Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and Skunky from Bunny vs Monkey) in costume this morning, and seeing the other kids - it makes my heart sing.

I’ve not seen any suspicious masonry or giant wheels of cheese with a mind of their own…but there’s still time.

Every Wednesday, when I put the bins out, I am greeted by the sound of church bells / bell-ringers practicing.

I like to think it's some sort of council run reminder, which would be the most Surrey thing ever.

Domine dirige nos benna as the Latin motto for bin night.

Food FACT: The original name for 'I Can't Believe It's Not Butter', 'Butter, My Arse' was rejected due to problems with punctuation.